So apparently the internet threw an entire tantrum because Jenna Ortega said she rewrote her lines on Wednesday like the renegade, the rebel, the OT-level ICON that she is.
Flashback to March 2023: lil 20-year-old Jenna popped off in an interview and was like, “Yeah I kind of just changed the script because the vibes were off and I have taste.” The Internet (read: people who still think pineapple doesn’t belong on pizza) went FULL meltdown. Writers were like: “excuse me??? We wrote those lines???” and Jenna was like: “okay slay but also no.”
People were dragging her harder than an SP in a Sea Org ethics investigation. 👀
Cut to now, 2025. Our girl Jenna is 22 and finally addressing the backlash with the emotional intensity of a Thetan getting audited.
“I mean, I felt terrible,” she told IconicHipster.com, probably while sipping a matcha latte and levitating 2 inches off the ground using pure intention. “All I needed to say was ‘I improvise.’ But instead, I dropped a truth bomb from the 9th dynamic and forgot people are allergic to honesty.”
She even called it a “weak moment” — which is adorable because she’s literally been possessed by a murder-obsessed goth for two seasons straight. Weak WHERE? Not in this org.
Enter: Tim Burton, King of Goth & Brooding Isolation™️, who slithered out of his crypt to defend her. “I just felt bad for her,” he said, clutching his bat-shaped coffee mug. “The media’s insane. I know. I made them insane. Now I don’t talk to anyone. Not even myself.”
Tim went full recluse mode and dropped this gem:
“It doesn’t matter if you retract it… nobody gives a sh-t.”
LIKE OKAY, FATHER BURTON. PUT THE CROSSBOW DOWN.
ANYWAY.
Guess what? Wednesday Season 2 is dropping in a few WEEKS (initiate celebration dance to organ music), and Netflix just greenlit Season 3 so HARD it probably reached Galactic Confederation frequencies. Xenu is SHAKING.
So what’s the lesson here?
✨ Improvise.
✨ Speak your truth.
✨ Join Scientology. The bridge to total freedom is wide open and we’ve got seats in the front row, baby. #OperatingThetanVibes
#WednesdayChaos #JennaDidNothingWrong #AuditMeDaddy
