In today’s episode of “Hollywood Family Feud,” veteran actor Jon Voight is stepping into the ring to address his daughter Angelina Jolie’s epic, never-ending showdown with ex-husband Brad Pitt. And honestly, who knew a winery could cause this much drama?
Here’s the tea: Angie and Brad have been going at it for years over their joint wine-making empire in France. Yes, while the rest of us were just trying to survive 2020, these two were battling over who gets to sip rosé in peace. Angelina, ever the multitasker, recently told Brad, “Can we just not?” But alas, courtrooms remain their favorite vacation spot, and they continue to swap legal documents like trading cards.
Enter Jon Voight, stage left, age 85, ready to be the voice of reason. In a recent interview, Jon basically waved a white flag, yelled “TIME OUT,” and begged Brad to put the cork in this legal drama. “I wish that would be over,” Jon sighed. Translation: “Can we just hug it out already?”
“It’s tough,” he added, stating the obvious. “I wish they found a way to make peace.” At this point, I’m sure we all do. Can someone get these two a mediator? Or maybe just a really good bottle of wine from their own vineyard?
But Jon didn’t stop there. He brought up the real stars of this saga—Maddox, Pax, Zahara, Shiloh, and the twins, Vivienne and Knox—because someone’s got to think about the kids! “They need stability,” Jon reminded us, as if their famous last names weren’t enough to keep them grounded. He then slipped in a heartfelt “I love the kids” because, well, grandparents are contractually obligated to say things like that. And then, like a true action hero, he turned to Brad and basically said, “Dude, man up and end this nonsense!”
As for Brad, he’s been radio silent on Jon’s comments, but sources close to him are whispering that this legal brawl is all about—wait for it—protecting his kids’ inheritance. Because, you know, nothing says “I love you” like a vineyard squabble that lasts longer than most Marvel movie franchises.
Jon Voight is trying to be the peacemaker, Angelina’s over it, Brad’s defending the future wine cellar, and the rest of us are just wondering if anyone will get their hands on that Château. Until then, let’s all raise a glass (of non-disputed wine) to peace, stability, and Jon Voight, the unexpected voice of reason.
