Once upon a time, in the magical land of fame and fortune, there was a dazzling actress named Meghan Markle. She rocked the screens of a popular cable drama, living a life filled with free clothes, elite circles, and private planes. She was the epitome of eat, pray, love summers—until she decided to swap the British tea for Hollywood glitz.
Our heroine, the Duchess of Sussex, had it all, or so they thought. Little did she know that after two years in the UK, her fairy tale was about to take a dark twist. Enter Richard Eden, wizard of royal gossip, claiming Meghan was clinically depressed and even contemplated the ultimate drama queen move – a royal exit via suicide. Yikes!
But fear not, for our resilient protagonist packed her bags, flipped a royal finger to the palace, and embarked on a journey to heal and thrive. However, according to the all-knowing Eden, Meghan is now just a Hollywood wannabe. Why, you ask? Because apparently, the Windsors are the real deal, the “24 carat celebrities.”
Eden paints a vivid picture of Meghan strutting down the red carpet in Los Angeles, sans Prince Harry. Oh, the horror! No longer a regal royal, she’s just another celebrity waiting to be interviewed by Variety magazine. The nerve! According to Eden, success is no longer in her hands; it’s in the mighty paws of Netflix.
But hold on to your tiaras, because Eden’s fairy tale takes a detour to Fact-Check Land. While Meghan was stealing the spotlight on the red carpet, Harry and she were actually gallivanting in Canada, checking out the Invictus Games and charming local charities. Who needs a stuffy state banquet at Buckingham Palace when you can have a hockey game and charitable deeds, right?
And let’s not forget the royal desire to be the A-listers they never were. King Charles and Camilla pulled off an epic stunt on American Idol, trying to prove they’re the cool kids too. The Windsors even attempted to cling to Meghan’s stardom when she grooved at Beyonce’s birthday bash. Desperate times call for desperate measures, and these royals were practically begging for an invitation to Meghan and Harry’s celebrity soirées.
But the cherry on top of this royal sundae is Eden’s delusional vision of Meghan cozying up at a Buckingham Palace state banquet. Hold your horses, Eden! The Windsors were so terrified and racially biased that they wouldn’t even send Meghan an invite to their fancy dinner parties. In his alternate reality, Eden imagines a world where the Windsors embrace Meghan with open arms, but we all know that’s just a fairy tale ending fit for a bedtime story in Buckingham Palace.
— Richard Eden (@richardaeden) November 23, 2023