Kristin Cavallari might have just taken a turn down Conspiracy Lane and ran straight into “What-is-Reality” Avenue, bringing Britney Spears along for the ride. And trust me, it’s just as delightfully absurd as it sounds.
So, buckle up because on the latest episode of Let’s Be Honest, Kristin revealed that the Princess of Pop herself recently tried to get her digits. And no, it wasn’t to exchange banana bread recipes or discuss the best dry shampoos. Oh no, Britney wanted in on Kristin’s wild clone theory. Yep, that’s right—clone theory. Apparently, this is where we are now.
Kristin set the scene with her usual casual flair: “I get a call from my publicist. He goes, ‘Guess who wants your phone number?’ So naturally, I say, ‘Is it Santa Claus? Tom from MySpace? Beyoncé finally responding to my fan mail?’ But no. He says, ‘Britney f–king Spears!’”
Cue dramatic music and possibly an alien abduction beam.
Now, why would Britney Spears, the queen of cryptic Instagram posts and backflips, be calling Kristin? Well, Kristin assumes it’s because of her very subtle previous statements like, “Kanye’s a clone, and Britney isn’t Britney.” Just a normal Tuesday thought, right? But this phone call? This was serious. Kristin’s spidey senses tingled. “I was scared,” she admitted. “Like, they’re f–king onto me, man. They didn’t like that podcast episode. I mean, if they did, they’d send cookies, not Britney’s phone request!”
But wait—it gets better. Kristin’s publicist adds her to a group text with Britney and the pop star’s manager. Now, if you thought your group chats were chaotic, imagine this one. Somewhere, someone’s grandmother just texted, “Who dis?” and accidentally sent a meme of a dancing cat.
Britney sends a message—oh, and Kristin assures us it’s a rollercoaster of emojis, random capitalization, and possibly some hieroglyphics. “I’m not gonna read it,” Kristin teases. “But trust me, it was like getting a message from someone who’s halfway through an escape room but also kind of wants to ask for a sandwich.”
In the spirit of friendship (or investigative journalism; who knows at this point?), Kristin slides into Britney’s DMs directly. “I’m so nice,” she says. “Like, ‘Hey girl, I’m barely in L.A. these days, but come December, let’s grab a juice, do some awkward selfies. You know, the works.’”
And then? Radio silence. The queen of “Oops!…I Did It Again” ghosted her. Kristin’s eyebrow shot up faster than a Kardashian’s marriage-to-divorce timeline. “Now I really think you’re a f–king clone,” Kristin declared. “This isn’t even ghosting—this is clone-level evasion.”
Wrapping up her detective saga, Kristin throws down her mic (figuratively; she’s no monster). “None of this seems real. Britney, if you’re out there—or your clone is—just know, I’m onto you. And I’ll keep sipping my tea and podcasting about it until proven otherwise.”