NASA Astronauts Finally Escaping Space After Accidental Nine-Month “Vacation”

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After an unexpected nine-month stay in space, NASA’s Butch Wilmore and Suni Williams are finally heading home—probably eager for some gravity and a non-dehydrated meal.

Originally scheduled for a quick eight-day trip to the International Space Station (ISS), the duo found themselves in an extended cosmic Airbnb stay when their ride, Boeing’s Starliner spacecraft, decided to take a long nap due to technical difficulties. Basically, it went, “Yeah, I’m not feeling it today,” and left them stranded.

Now, they’re hitching a ride back to Earth in a SpaceX capsule—because when in doubt, call Elon. They’re joined by NASA’s Nick Hague and Russian cosmonaut Aleksandr Gorbunov, making this a very awkward, high-altitude carpool.

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Re-Entry: Now Featuring G-Forces and Giant Parachutes!
At approximately 1 a.m. ET on March 18, the group said, “See ya, space!” and undocked from the ISS. They’re expected to splash down off the Florida coast around 6 p.m. ET, assuming Florida’s weather cooperates (which, let’s be honest, is a big assumption).

As they plummet through Earth’s atmosphere, they’ll experience around four times the planet’s gravity. That’s like an extreme rollercoaster ride—except they can’t scream because they’re too busy making sure they don’t explode. Four massive parachutes will deploy to slow them down, ensuring they gently land in the ocean instead of violently crash into it. Thanks, science!

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Boeing’s Starliner: The Ghost Ship of 2024
The whole reason for this extended space stay? The Starliner capsule developed a case of “nah, I’m good” and was deemed too risky for a return trip. Instead of bringing the astronauts home, it quietly snuck back to Earth in September empty, like a self-driving Uber that forgot to pick up its passengers.

In the meantime, Butch and Suni kept themselves busy—floating around, conducting experiments, and taking spacewalks. In fact, Suni Williams casually broke the record for most time spent outside the ISS by a woman, probably because she had nowhere else to be.

Final Thoughts from Our Accidental Space Residents
Despite being in orbitary limbo for nearly a year, the astronauts seem to have kept their spirits high.

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“We came up prepared to stay long, even though we planned to stay short,” Butch said, proving that astronauts are basically the ultimate over-prepared travelers.

“I don’t want to lose that spark of inspiration when I leave, so I’m going to have to bottle it somehow,” Suni added, possibly hinting at starting a very exclusive line of astronaut-themed perfumes.

NASA is live-streaming their return, so if you’ve ever wanted to watch four people freefall from space in a glorified metal can, tune in now! 🚀

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