Venice, Italy – land of gondolas, overpriced gelato, and apparently, whirlwind romance rumors! Angelina Jolie, the 49-year-old actress with cheekbones that could cut glass, turned heads at the 2024 Venice Film Festival. But, let’s be real, when doesn’t she?
As if her new film Maria wasn’t enough to get people talking, she was spotted casually strolling with British rapper and activist Akala, 40. That’s right – because nothing screams “soft launch of a relationship” like a walk in Venice, the universal signal for “WE MIGHT BE DATING… or just trying to find a decent pizza.”
Cue the rumor mill! Is Angelina about to add “rapper’s girlfriend” to her extensive résumé? Are they the next power couple in Hollywood, set to dominate the tabloids faster than you can say “Brangelina 2.0”?
Spoiler alert: No. According to insiders with more knowledge than your friend who swears they saw Bigfoot, this is a false alarm. TMZ, the oracle of modern gossip, swooped in to save us all from rampant speculation, revealing that Akala’s actual girlfriend, Chanelle, was there too. Apparently, she was just strategically outside the frame. You know, like a ninja in a love triangle photo op.
Turns out Angelina and Akala have been buddies for years. That’s right—decades of friendship, no mixtape of romance. It’s just good old-fashioned platonic camaraderie. Sorry, romantics, this isn’t the spicy celebrity couple you were hoping for.
In even more boring yet adult news, Angelina is, in fact, single, focusing on her family and career. You know, like a responsible, well-adjusted adult. But hey, it’s always fun to imagine!
So, for now, the only thing Angelina is launching is her new movie. Better luck next time, romance detectives!
