Kanye West — yes, that Ye, the guy who invented couches with no backs and calls himself a genius in third person — is now being sued again by his former assistant, Lauren Pisciotta. And babes, this isn’t just a regular lawsuit. This is like, season finale of every crime show ever made kind of lawsuit.
According to new legal docs (aka the most traumatic Google Doc you’ll ever read), Lauren is accusing Ye of everything from assault and stalking to sex trafficking and false imprisonment. Basically the entire “DO NOT DO THIS” page of a human behavior manual.
Let’s break it down like TikTok drama in the group chat:
📍Allegedly, during a work trip for his Donda school (you know, the school that sounds like a cult where the uniforms are made of recycled trench coats), Ye started getting real weird. Like, asks-you-about-your-vagina-at-work weird. 🤢
📍She claims he kissed her outta nowhere, and later at a recording session, he allegedly masturbated mid-convo and touched her… then fell asleep while still talking. SIR?? WHO DOES THAT?? Sleepy and creepy is a hell combo.
📍Then it allegedly got even darker. She says he barged into her hotel room, demanded a shower, and then forced himself on her. The details here are disturbing and awful, and her claims include oral assault, begging him to stop, and her freezing in fear. 😔💔
📍Afterwards? Allegedly a weird little “oopsie” apology and Ye just walked out like it was a sitcom episode. 🚶♂️??
📍It gets even weirder (we know, how is that possible): she claims Ye tried to “trade her” like she was a Pokémon card — offering her to someone so he could hook up with their partner. Allegedly, this is something he “notoriously” did. Who is out here normalizing people-swapping like it’s brunch reservations???
📍OH! And let’s not forget — she also previously said he drugged her at a studio sesh co-hosted by Diddy. That sentence alone deserves its own Netflix documentary with a black-and-white intro and Lana Del Rey music.
The lawsuit is ongoing, but this whole thing is giving “cancelled for eternity,” “maybe needs to be exorcised,” and “WTF is happening??” energy.
We’ll keep you updated as this legal circus unfolds, but for now, whew. Protect women. Believe women. And maybe don’t ever go to a hotel with Kanye West.
#KanyeWest #LawsuitDrama #YeGoneTooFar #DarkYeRises #WTFisHappening #ICONICMESS
