Johnny Depp just apparated all the tea and it is SCALDING. We’re talking hotter than Draco Malfoy in a fitted suit.
Back in 2020 (a.k.a. the year Earth glitched), Johnny Depp was unceremoniously booted from the “Fantastic Beasts” franchise faster than you can say Expelli-CANCEL-us. Yup, he was playing the icy, psycho-sexy villain Gellert Grindelwald until Warner Bros said, “thank u, next” and replaced him with Mads Mikkelsen — aka the man who looks like he’s always plotting to poison your tea… but in a hot way.
Johnny just finally opened his mouth like a spellbook to The Telegraph and the drama is giving Cursed Child but make it HBO. He said the whole thing ended “in a millisecond.” Like bro, one second he’s in his trailer eating wizard-themed snacks and the next they were like “Hi Johnny, can we chat?” aka Hollywood code for you’re about to get Voldemorted.
Apparently, he’d already filmed one whole magical lil scene before they were like “we’d like you to resign” (👀 not fire, RESIGN — gotta keep that PR damage lowkey, huh?). But Johnny decoded that wizard riddle real quick: “They wanted me to retire,” he said. Oh no they didn’t.
And THEN — this is where it goes full ✨feral✨ — Johnny literally told them, “F–k you. There’s far too many of me to kill.” SIR. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN. Are there Horcruxes??? Is Johnny Depp secretly a multiverse??? Is he a Time-Turner in a leather jacket?? We have zero answers and 74 new questions.
He continued, “If you think you can hurt me more than I’ve already been hurt, you’re gravely mistaken.” Translation: This man has been THROUGH it and he’s not about to be defeated by a studio executive with a bad haircut.
Anyway, someone tell Dumbledore he’s got beef brewing in the Forbidden Forest. And someone tell Warner Bros to stop starting wizard wars — the fandom is TIRED.
#JusticeForGrindelwald #JohnnyVsHollywood #WizardDramaUnleashed 🧙♂️🫖🔥
