Bravo overlord Andy Cohen has finally addressed the earth-shattering news about Vanderpump Rules’ major shake-up, and honey, he did not hold back. In case you’ve been living under a reality TV-free rock, here’s the headline: everyone—yes, everyone—on the show not named Lisa Vanderpump has been handed their walking papers for season 12. That’s right, it’s out with the old SURvers and in with a brand-new batch of drama magnets.
Andy, our silver-haired Sultan of Sass, broke his silence on the Monday (December 2) episode of Andy Cohen Live on SiriusXM. At 56, he’s still stirring the Bravo pot like a pro.
“Word’s out—Bravo’s giving Vanderpump Rules a facelift. And honestly, this is the move,” Andy proclaimed, possibly while sipping a skinny margarita. He then tipped his hat to the production team for keeping the show afloat these past four years, despite the not-so-secret fact that no one was actually working at SUR anymore.
“It’s been a slow breakup between the cast and the restaurant,” Andy confessed. “At one point, James Kennedy was the only one with any connection to SUR, and even that was just him popping in to DJ now and then. And now James has traded in the turntables at SUR for a Vegas residency. The rest of the cast? Living their best lives far, far away from cocktail trays and goat cheese balls.”
And because Andy is nothing if not dramatic, he went on to declare the season 11 finale as chef’s kiss perfection. “If you rewatch those last five to ten minutes, it’s like the end of an era. I mean, it felt like a series finale. So, congrats to everyone. You crushed it.”
Translation: “Thanks for the memes, but it’s time for a new crop of aspiring fame monsters to clock in at SUR.”
As for season 12? Bravo’s keeping the premiere date under wraps, but one thing’s for sure: the drama will be served extra spicy. Stay tuned—and maybe pour one out for your favorite former SURvers, preferably into a gold-encrusted goblet à la LVP.