A$AP Rocky’s lawyer has officially had enough of the internet’s conspiracy theories, and he’s here to set the record straight.
The 36-year-old rapper’s legal eagle, Joe Tacopina (who, let’s be honest, has probably seen everything at this point), clapped back at the wild claims that Rihanna showed up to court with their two adorable kids as some kind of “sympathy strategy” amid Rocky’s felony shooting case.
Now, let’s pause for a second. Are we seriously implying that Rihanna—yes, the billionaire, makeup mogul, and literal queen of cool—needs a sympathy ploy? From a jury? Over a case that ended in a not guilty verdict? Yeah, okay. Let’s continue.
The Courtroom Cameo That Shook the Internet
Last week, as the grand legal saga of A$AP Rocky reached its thrilling conclusion, Rihanna—being the supportive, ride-or-die partner she is—decided to pull up to the Los Angeles courthouse with their two tiny humans, 2-year-old RZA and 1-year-old Riot Rose. And, predictably, the internet lost its collective mind.
Speaking on The Breakfast Club, Tacopina rolled his eyes (okay, maybe not literally, but we felt it) at the idea that Rihanna was trying to manipulate the jury with the mere presence of two pint-sized fashion icons.
“One day Rihanna brought the babies to court, and people were thinking it was a ploy, like some sort of maneuver to get the jury to feel sympathy,” Tacopina explained, probably resisting the urge to facepalm.
But here’s the kicker: “The jury’s not feeling sympathy; they know he has a wife and kids.” Translation: The jurors weren’t sitting there like, Oh no, this man has a family! Quick, acquit him before the toddlers cry!
Reality Check: Why Rihanna Really Brought the Babies
Turns out, the real reason Rihanna pulled up with the kiddos was way more emotional and way less strategic.
“It was more because it was the last day of the trial … she brought them to court because that could’ve been the last time he’d seen his kids for a decade or more,” Tacopina said. Cue dramatic music.
So, instead of cooking up some master plan to sway the jury, Rihanna was simply being a concerned partner and mother. Imagine that.
But wait—things got even spicier when the prosecutor apparently tried to make a big deal out of the whole baby cameo in his summation. According to Tacopina, that move was a “fatal mistake,” which is lawyer-speak for you really fumbled the bag on that one, buddy.
Rocky’s Reaction: Protective Boyfriend Mode Activated
And if you’re wondering how A$AP Rocky felt about Rihanna’s courtroom entrance, he was not about it at first.
“He didn’t want her there,” Tacopina revealed. “He was very protective of her.” (Which, fair. She’s Rihanna. She must be protected at all costs.)
But because Rihanna is, well, Rihanna, she wasn’t about to sit this one out. Apparently, she gave Tacopina a call and hit him with, “Joe, wild horses aren’t going to keep me away, so let him know I’m coming and deal with him.”
And honestly? That might be the most Rihanna thing Rihanna has ever said.
The Verdict
– A$AP Rocky is officially not guilty.
– Rihanna did not stage a courtroom PR stunt—she was just being a loving mom and partner.
– The babies were simply there, existing in their stylish little outfits, not testifying or passing out “Free Rocky” flyers.
– Rihanna is still the boss of all bosses, and wild horses (or the internet’s theories) will not keep her away.
The end. Now, can we all go back to minding our business and waiting for new music?
