Walmart is trimming the fat—and not in the healthy kale-smoothie way. More like the “oops, we overspent on cargo ships and cardboard boxes” kind of way.
According to the Wall Street Journal (aka the newspaper your dad reads while shaking his head at gas prices), Walmart is planning to lay off about 1,500 people. That’s a lot of khakis walking out the door. The cuts are aimed at shaving off expenses, because apparently Walmart’s piggy bank is feeling light—even though they sell them for $2.97 in aisle 7.
So who’s getting the corporate boot? Teams in global tech, e-commerce fulfillment (aka the people who make sure your LED ring light arrives in two days), and Walmart Connect, the company’s ad biz. Yes, even the people who convince you to buy Paw Patrol shampoo during a search for paper towels are in danger. Brutal.
Now, Walmart isn’t just your go-to for pool noodles, frozen waffles, and suspiciously cheap jeans—it’s also America’s biggest private employer, with 1.6 million U.S. workers. Worldwide? A whopping 2.1 million. That’s more people than follow your ex’s influencer ex on Instagram. Seriously.
But here’s the tea: Walmart also happens to import a lot of stuff—like 60% of its inventory—from China. We’re talking toys, electronics, and enough hoodies to clothe Gen Z and Gen Alpha twice over.
Enter stage right: Donald Trump, the orange-tinted former Prez and full-time internet commenter, who’s real mad about those price hikes. Walmart announced last week it would raise some prices due to the ongoing trade war with China (aka the international version of “I saw your subtweet and I’m not happy”).
But Trump, never one to stay quiet, hopped onto Truth Social like it was a WWE SmackDown promo and posted:
“Walmart should STOP trying to blame Tariffs as the reason for raising prices… Between Walmart and China they should, as is said, ‘EAT THE TARIFFS,’ and not charge valued customers ANYTHING.”
Yes, friends. The former President wants a multinational corporation and an entire country to metaphorically eat taxes. Like a Happy Meal. With a side of “I’m watching you 👀.”
He closed it off with:
“I’ll be watching, and so will your customers!!!”
Somewhere in a Walmart break room, a cashier quietly turned off the security camera.
Meanwhile, even Temu—the mysterious shopping app that somehow sells 27-piece cookware sets for $4.89—is making moves because of these tariff tantrums.
Walmart’s cutting jobs, prices are rising, Trump wants people to snack on economic policy, and we’re all just here trying to buy Doritos and body wash in peace.
Welcome to capitalism, baby. It’s rollback time—but not in the good way.
