Tori Spelling, known for her role on Beverly Hills, 90210 and for surviving life with five kids, three big dogs, one cat, and (because why not?) a ferret, has given us the wildest tale of mom survival ever. The actress took to Instagram to recount her escape from the Los Angeles fires—and honestly, it sounds like an action movie starring her SUV and a whole lot of chaos.
“The Post I Didn’t Want to Make…”
Tori kicked things off by explaining why she hadn’t posted sooner. Spoiler: it wasn’t because she lost her phone in the chaos—it’s because social media was already overloaded with fire updates. “I didn’t want to be redundant,” she explained, which is code for: “I didn’t need my story competing with everyone else’s dramatic selfies of ash falling.”
But then, plot twist! Last night, she and her squad—five kids, the aforementioned pets, and her trusty ferret—had to pack up real fast. Apparently, waiting it out wasn’t working anymore. “Mama Bear instincts kicked in,” Tori said, which translates to: “I realized I can’t fit ‘stubbornness’ in my emergency kit.”
How Many Living Beings Can You Cram into an SUV?
Picture this: one SUV, five kids, three large dogs (think Clifford the Big Red Dog’s cousins), a cat (probably judging everyone), and a ferret who was probably just thrilled to be part of the drama. No clothes made the cut, but photo albums did. Tori, we respect your priorities.
She admitted she’d been told for days to pack a plan. Instead, she went for the “wing it and panic” approach. But hey, it worked! Kind of.
“Mom, Are We Driving INTO the Fire?!”
As if this wasn’t chaotic enough, Tori took the scenic route—right into the smoke-filled abyss. Her kids, demonstrating next-level survival instincts, questioned their mom’s navigation skills: “Mom, you sure about this? The freeway going the other way looks safer.”
But Tori? She’s unshakable. “Mother instinct took over,” she said, which roughly translates to, “I ignored Google Maps and just prayed a lot.” She told her kids to “breathe deep, hold it, and cover your noses with T-shirts.” The ferret was probably like, “I didn’t sign up for this.”
Airbnb Saves the Day
Somewhere in this apocalyptic road trip, Tori remembered her new friend Jami, who works with Airbnb. (Lesson: always network at holiday parties!) Jami worked her magic, and voilà! The Spelling Caravan of Chaos had a place to stay that very night. Shoutout to Taylor from Airbnb, who apparently stayed on the phone like some kind of fire evacuation hotline hero.
From Smoke to Butterflies
By morning, the crew woke up to something straight out of a Pinterest board: a koi pond and a monarch butterfly sanctuary. Naturally, Tori took this as a cosmic sign from her dad, legendary TV producer Aaron Spelling, because if butterflies don’t scream “Dad vibes,” what does?
Tori’s Takeaway
The moral of Tori’s fire adventure? Always listen to your friends when they tell you to pack, don’t underestimate the power of an SUV, and never leave your ferret behind. Also, if life hands you chaos, call Airbnb—they’ve got your back.