Sean Kingston, Mr. “Beautiful Girls” himself, has found himself in an ugly situation—and no, it’s not another flop single. The 35-year-old singer was recently locked up like Akon after he fumbled the bag… literally. The $100,000 bond bag. Bro forgot step one of “how to not stay in jail”: actually pay the bond.
According to court docs (and you know those never lie), Sean was chilling in the Federal Detention Center of Miami, aka the least lit VIP section in Florida, for a few days. Why? Because instead of sending a wire transfer, he apparently thought “vibes” would be enough.
But plot twist! On Tuesday (April 15), his lawyer—Zeljka Bozanic, who sounds like she takes zero nonsense and drinks her coffee black—told IconicHipster.com, “Mr. Kingston’s bond has been posted and he is in the process of being released.” Translation: someone finally found their wallet. As of now, Sean’s back on house arrest, rocking the latest in GPS ankle monitor chic. Alexa, play “Locked Up” on repeat.
And let’s not forget the dynamic duo: Sean and his mom, Janice Turner (aka Mama Fraud?). The two were previously found guilty on FIVE counts of fraud, which is basically one count for every hit Sean had (okay maybe two). They’re now facing up to 20 years per count—which, if you’re doing the math, is a whole lot of time to come up with a new mixtape.
Their alleged “Ocean’s Two” scam involved scheming high-end car dealers, jewelry sellers, and luxury goods providers using fake documents. So yeah, they were out here pretending to be The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills while signing checks that bounced harder than Sean’s last tour.
The sentencing is scheduled for July 11, so mark your calendars—or don’t, because this whole thing feels like an episode of “Scammy & Son.”
Until then, Sean is at home, monitored, and hopefully not trying to order another Bugatti with a Chuck E. Cheese coupon.
