So, picture this: Jamie, Gordon Smart, and their Northern Irish buddies decided to mix golf, wine, and espresso martinis on a fateful trip to Portugal. Sounds like the beginning of a joke, right? Well, it turned out to be a punchline, but not the kind you’d expect.
Gordon, the Scottish broadcaster, spilled the beans on BBC’s The Good, the Bad, and the Unexpected about the bizarre incident. After a night of indulging in fermented grapes and fancy martinis, Gordon started feeling a tingling sensation in his left hand and arm. Now, most of us would blame it on a heavy night out, but not Gordon. No, he diagnosed himself with the classic symptoms of a heart attack.
Cue the drama! Gordon ended up in a local hospital with a heart rate hitting 210 BPM. But wait, it gets better (or worse, depending on your perspective). Picture Gordon collapsed in an Uber, only to wake up in a hospital bed with doctors bombarding him with questions about his alcohol consumption. Classic hangover move, right?
As Gordon lay there contemplating the choices that led him to this point, he noticed a fellow lad from their merry group wheeling past on another hospital bed. Doctors were grilling him with the same questions, and Gordon couldn’t help but think, “This can’t be good; we’re in the same sinking ship of inebriation!”
But the comedy didn’t end there. Back at their digs, Gordon discovered Jamie Dornan hooked up to all sorts of medical gizmos. Apparently, Jamie experienced numbness in his limbs and found himself in the back of an ambulance not long after Gordon’s grand exit.
Fast forward to a week later, and Gordon gets a call from a doctor. The good doctor was investigating whether the crew had crossed paths with caterpillars on the golf course. Caterpillars? Really? It turns out that Portugal’s southern golf courses harbor processionary caterpillars, armed with tiny hairs and a protein that can cause rashes, pain, and, wait for it, heart attacks in men in their 40s. Move over, caffeine overdoses and hangovers โ toxic caterpillars are the new cool.
A night of golf, drinks, and toxic caterpillars in Portugal. Who knew that a leisurely golf trip could turn into a plotline straight out of a sitcom? Jamie Dornan and the poisonous caterpillars โ coming soon to a theater of the absurd near you!