Move over, Nancy Drew—there’s a new detective in town, and she’s catching criminals in high-definition. A Wisconsin woman, known only as “JH” (which we assume stands for Justifiably Hacked Off), went full spy mode after suspecting her work beverages were being tampered with. And boy, did she uncover some next-level office sabotage.
Suspicion, Spy Cams, and Soda Sabotage
JH started feeling like something was off with her drinks. They had a funky smell and an even funkier taste—because nothing says “refreshing office beverage” like hints of industrial adhesive. After sipping her mystery-flavored soda and promptly getting sick, JH did what any rational person would do: she set up a secret camera to bust the soda-spiking scoundrel.
Caught in 4K: The Office Bandit at Work
Enter Joseph R. Ross, 34, a co-worker with a suspiciously strong interest in arts and crafts adhesives. According to the Milwaukee County court records, Ross was caught red-handed (or should we say, glue-handed) adding some extra ingredients to JH’s soft drink—namely, super glue. Because clearly, when given the choice between being a decent human being and turning someone’s soda into a DIY project, Ross chose chaos.
The hidden camera allegedly captured Ross hovering over JH’s drink, gripping what appeared to be a small bottle with a white nozzle. Spoiler alert: it was not vanilla syrup. Police later discovered a balled-up pair of latex gloves containing—drumroll, please—a container of Gorilla Brand Super Glue. Because when you commit a crime, always make sure to leave behind conveniently labeled evidence.
Office Prank or Felony? Spoiler: It’s a Felony
When questioned, Ross reportedly admitted to putting a “supplement” in JH’s drink, which is the most generous description of super glue we’ve ever heard. If convicted, Ross faces up to three and a half years in state prison and a $10,000 fine—an expensive price to pay for attempting to turn a co-worker’s esophagus into a craft project.
Meanwhile, the Wisconsin State Fair Park police, who responded to the incident, issued a firm no trespassing order against Ross. Translation: He is officially uninvited from all future funnel cake festivities.
Let this be a lesson to office workers everywhere: if your soda starts smelling like a hardware store, maybe invest in a hidden camera—and avoid co-workers who bring latex gloves to work for non-medical reasons.