Cue the dramatic music because Olympian Ryan Lochte, age 40 and proud owner of multiple shiny gold medals, is opening up about a real-life action sequence straight out of a movie—only with more trash trucks and fewer car chases. Last November, Lochte found himself in a scene that’s more “Oops, I did it again” than “Fast & Furious,” when a car accident left him with various injuries, including a leg that clearly didn’t read the part of his body’s “invincible athlete” memo.
But never fear! His wife, Kayla, 33, and their kids were there to document the comeback of the century. Forget Instagram influencers pushing detox teas; these guys are posting wheelchair content. Yes, in a heartwarming family video, we see Ryan rolling back into his home with 7-year-old son Caiden Zane playing chauffeur. Who needs Uber when you’ve got kid-powered wheelchair services? Meanwhile, his other children—Georgia June, age 1, and Liv Rae, age 5—were off in the background doing what all toddlers do best: chaos, probably involving crumbs and toys strewn everywhere.
But wait, there’s more! The video also features Ryan trying to outdo your grandpa’s post-surgery walker routine in the hospital, with a bonus appearance by a scar that runs from his hip to his leg. This thing is so big, it’s practically auditioning for a role in a slasher film. And just when you thought it was over, bam! There’s footage of Ryan running again! (Well, “running” might be a generous term—let’s call it a heroic, slightly wobbly limp. Still, we’re rooting for you, champ!)
The Instagram caption reads, “Life’s setbacks may knock you down, but they set the stage for an even stronger comeback!” Or in this case, a stronger walker-back, but who’s counting? They also remind us that Ryan’s literally putting in the work “one step at a time.” We see what you did there, Lochte.
Of course, Ryan had more to share on the Athletes Only podcast in January. He detailed how, in what sounds like a deleted scene from Final Destination, his life flashed before his eyes when he met the real star of the show: a trash truck. Apparently, this trash truck was doing its best impression of a roadblock with no lights or warning cones, just chillin’ in the middle of a four-lane street like it owned the place. The car in front of Ryan swerved, but when our man Lochte tried to avoid the situation, he “freaking ran into the damn thing.” Words to live by, people.
Miraculously, the only casualty was Ryan’s ability to walk without a limp, and he’s been doing physical therapy like a champ ever since. As for the truck? Still living its best life, collecting garbage and scaring Olympic swimmers.
According to Lochte, an investigator told him, “I have to tell their relatives that he’s dead,” which really helps set the mood for future holiday dinners. “I can’t believe how you did this, but you have a savior,” the investigator continued. Lochte’s conclusion? “I guess I’m a cat that has nine lives. I don’t know what life I’m on now.” Spoiler alert: probably somewhere between 4 and 6, if we’re counting trash trucks and prior shenanigans.
So here’s to Ryan Lochte, our favorite nine-lives-having, scar-flaunting, walker-wielding Olympian! We’re thrilled to see him on the road to recovery, one hilarious Instagram post at a time.
