The news of Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez’s latest divorce made its way to the 2024 Democratic National Convention. Yes, you read that right. Divorce drama has officially hit the political stage.
Stepping up as the unlikely bearer of bad celebrity news was none other than Mindy Kaling, comedian, actress, and apparently part-time divorce analyst. She wasn’t just at the convention to cheer on her BFF and presidential hopeful Kamala Harris (who’s definitely hoping her campaign stays more intact than Ben and Jen’s marriage). No, Mindy also decided to throw in a little celebrity roast while she was at it.
Taking the stage with the poise of someone who’s definitely been told the bar is closed before, Mindy looked out at the crowd and said with all the gravity of a reality TV host, “I couldn’t leave here without giving a shout out to the amazing delegation from my home state, Massachusetts. I love you, Massachusetts!” Clearly, her priorities were in order: politics, state pride, and of course, Dunkin’ Donuts.
But it didn’t stop there. Mindy, always the comedic overachiever, threw a curveball into what could’ve been a normal pep rally for democracy: “Everyone is always hating on us, but they just don’t get it. Go Sox. Go Jayson Tatum. Ben Affleck, hang in there!” Yes, you heard it correctly. She just casually dropped the most Boston sentence ever, complete with references to sports, underdogs, and the city’s unofficial king of Dunkin’ Donuts commercials, Ben Affleck.
Ben, who probably had his phone buzzing off the hook with text messages like, “Dude, why is your divorce being talked about at the DNC?”, was raised in Boston, a city that never lets you forget where you came from, or how much Dunkin’ Donuts you’re supposed to drink in a day. Because obviously, that was next on Mindy’s checklist of Massachusetts essentials. “Dunkin Donuts is the best coffee in the world,” she declared with the kind of authority that can only come from being born and raised in a place that runs on iced coffee and passive-aggressive sports rivalries.
As the crowd laughed, somewhere in the world, Ben Affleck probably sat sipping his extra-large Dunkin’ coffee, wondering how his love life had become the unofficial soundtrack of the 2024 presidential race. Jennifer Lopez, meanwhile, was likely off doing something fabulous and unbothered, as is tradition.
Not even the Democratic National Convention is safe from celebrity breakups. Maybe next year we’ll see the Kardashians handing out ballots. But one thing’s for sure — no matter who you vote for, Boston will always have Ben, Dunkin’, and the collective love of America’s weirdly intense affection for his personal life.
