David Beckham, soccer legend, fashion icon, and apparently the human version of a label maker, has confessed that his superpower is… being too tidy. Like, aggressively tidy. Like, “I organize my socks by mood” tidy. And it’s driving his entire family bananas.
Speaking at the launch of his new supplement brand, IM8 (which, let’s be honest, sounds like a robot from Star Wars who gives really great wellness tips), the 49-year-old Brit took the mic in Miami and spilled the tea on the one habit that makes his family collectively sigh into the void.
“I am very organized to the point where it’s quite tiring every single day because I am so organized,” he said. Translation: David Beckham makes Marie Kondo look like a slob.
And who’s suffering most from this compulsive quest for cosmic order? His family, of course. Victoria “Posh Spice” Beckham and their four kids—Brooklyn (26), Romeo (22), Cruz (20), and Harper (13)—apparently have front row seats to the Daddy Tidy Show, and let’s just say, the reviews are mixed.
“It annoys my wife, at times. It annoys my kids, at times,” David admitted, probably while folding a napkin into an origami swan and color-coding the fruit basket.
But David’s got a defense ready, like the ultimate goalkeeper of cleanliness: “Without Daddy, nothing would be tidy and nothing would be organized and they’d be forgetting things.” Iconic dad logic. Basically: You may be annoyed, but you’d be living in chaos without me, so you’re welcome.
Now, if this sounds familiar, it’s because David also opened up about his OCD in his 2023 Netflix documentary Beckham. In it, he bravely revealed: “I’ve got this obsessive compulsive disorder where I have to have everything in a straight line or everything has to be in pairs.”
Yes, even his Pepsi cans aren’t safe. “If there’s one too many in the fridge, I’ll put it in another cupboard somewhere.” Imagine being a rogue Pepsi can in the Beckham household. Pure terror.
So next time you feel bad about your messy kitchen or chaotic closet, just remember: somewhere out there, David Beckham is aligning his vitamins by height, scrubbing his already-scrubbed counter, and relocating a single, uncooperative soda… all while looking like a snack in a tailored suit.
Stay organized, kids—but maybe not Beckham-level organized.
