NPR just went full legal drama on Donald J. Trump — and no, this is not a very serious segment from All Things Considered.
So here’s the tea brewed at exactly 185 degrees (because NPR doesn’t do anything halfway): NPR, along with three Colorado public radio stations (probably the ones that play classical music and indie rock during rush hour), just sued President Trump. Yes, like filed-a-federal-lawsuit-in-a-real-court sued.
Why? Because Trump pulled out his executive order Sharpie and basically said, “No more tax dollars for you!” to both NPR and PBS. (That’s right. Even Big Bird isn’t safe out here. Elmo is reportedly considering a collab diss track.)
The executive order claims NPR and PBS are just not “fair, accurate, or unbiased” enough — aka, they made Trump look bad on air without using an Instagram filter. So the administration decided to cut off funding like an angry dad canceling his spoiled kid’s credit card.
NPR wasn’t having it. They showed up in court with a stack of receipts — and probably a tote bag full of granola and constitutional law textbooks — arguing that this move is textbook retaliation (literally, like straight outta the “What Not to Do as a President” chapter).
The legal filing dropped a 🔥 quote:
“It is not always obvious when the government has acted with a retaliatory purpose… But this wolf comes as a wolf.”
Translation: Trump didn’t even bother to disguise this one. Usually you at least try to slap a wig and mustache on your villainy. This time, the wolf didn’t even put on sheep’s clothing. He just kicked down the door and started howling.
NPR President Katherine Maher (who is now my new favorite action hero) clapped back with:
“The Executive Order is a clear violation of the Constitution and the First Amendment’s protections for freedom of speech, association, and freedom of the press.”
Boom. Mic drop. Probably from a very expensive, public-funded microphone.
Trump’s order, meanwhile, says:
“Neither entity presents a fair, accurate or unbiased portrayal of current events to tax-paying citizens.”
Translation: They said mean things about me and I’m taking away their lunch money.
The lawsuit also goes after White House Budget Director Russel Vought, Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent, and the Chair of the National Endowment for the Arts (who was probably just trying to fund ballet performances in Iowa before getting roped into this mess).
So what happens next? Will NPR win and keep telling you about the most obscure documentaries you’ve never seen? Will PBS survive long enough for Ken Burns to finish his 47-hour special on the history of spoons?
Only time — and the courts — will tell.
In the meantime, for more on this very spicy government drama served with a side of classical cello music, head to NPR.org — before it turns into a true crime podcast.