(Spoiler: It’s Sabrina “Tiny But Mighty” Carpenter 😱)
OKAY SO—Offset just casually dropped a plot twist so chaotic it could’ve been written by the writers of Euphoria. In a moment that had no business being this entertaining, the 33-year-old rapper went full simp-mode for none other than pop’s tiniest powerhouse: Sabrina “Short Queen Energy” Carpenter.
It all went down in a Complex video where magician Anna DeGuzman (yes, an actual wizard) asked Offset to think of his celeb crush—but not say it out loud because ✨magic✨. Offset, clearly confused but vibing, locked in his choice. He didn’t say the name out loud, didn’t hum a song, didn’t even pretend to know what “Feather” sounds like—and yet this sorceress still pulled out a card that said “Sabrina Carpenter.”
Offset’s reaction? Total glitch in the Matrix.
“HOW YOU GET THIS RIGHT? THAT’S CRAZY. THAT’S CRAZY. THIS IS CAP! I AIN’T NEVER SAID THIS BEFORE.”
Bro was gagged. Gobsmacked. Glitched. Like he just saw Sabrina levitate into his DMs with angel wings and a glitter cannon.
And get this—he couldn’t even name one of her songs 😭. But he did say, “Artistically, she’s got it all together,” which is basically Grammy-level praise in man-language.
Now let’s add one more spicy meatball to this sauce pot: Offset is currently estranged from Cardi B (who filed for divorce in 2024), and this Sabrina revelation feels like a soft-launch of his new simp era. It’s giving ✨post-divorce whimsical chaos✨.
Offset stanning Sabrina was not on our 2025 bingo card but honestly? We ship it. Sabrina’s out here giving Barbie-core bops, and Offset is ready to risk it all—even if he has to Google her discography later.
TL;DR: Offset got magically exposed for having a celebrity crush on Sabrina Carpenter and now the internet is collectively spiraling.
🚨 Offset x Sabrina world tour WHEN?
🚨 Cardi B subtweet loading in 3…2…1…
#OffsetIsDownBad #SabrinaSlayed #MagicianExposedHisHeart
