Donald Trump Saves TikTok from Doom in a Blaze of Executive Order Glory – Here’s the Tea!

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Donald Trump, now the 47th President of the United States (plot twist?), just signed an executive order that’s got the internet doing the Renegade dance all over again. Forget the usual political humdrum—this is TikTok we’re talking about, where 170 million Americans get their daily dose of cringe, creativity, and questionable dance moves.

Trump’s Signing Spree: From Parade to Pen
Trump kicked off his first day in office like an overachiever on January 20, strutting straight from an indoor “inauguration parade” at Capital One Arena (because, why not?) to the White House, where he unleashed his pen like it was a Sharpie at a garage sale. Among his day-one promises, Trump flexed his executive order muscle to block the TikTok ban. Yes, you heard it right—the app lives to see another day.

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The TikTok-Saving Executive Order (AKA: The “Save My FYP” Act)
The official title is a mouthful—“Application of Protecting Americans From Foreign Adversary Controlled Applications Act to TikTok”—but the vibe is clear: TikTok isn’t going anywhere, at least not for the next 75 days. The order basically tells the Attorney General to take a breather, sip some kombucha, and hold off on banning the app while Trump’s crew figures out the whole “national security” situation.

The text of the order essentially screams, “Nobody touch TikTok until I say so!” Meanwhile, the Department of Justice is banned from throwing penalties or side-eyes at TikTok during this time. Updates, dances, thirst traps—all systems go.

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TikTok: From National Threat to National Treasure?
Trump says he plans to huddle with his advisors (read: the people who know how to turn on their phones) to sort out whether TikTok is a spy machine from abroad or just a harmless platform for cat videos and weird food hacks. While doing that, they’ll also comb through “sensitive intelligence” and assess whether TikTok’s been doing its homework on security measures.

In Trump’s words: “We gotta protect national security, but also, like, let people dance.”

TikTok Reacts: “Thanks, Prez!”
ICYMI, TikTok had a minor meltdown just before all this, going down for 14 hours on January 18. Coincidence? Conspiracy? Who knows. But when the app came back, TikTok was quick to give Trump props for “clearing things up” and ensuring its survival. Oh, and apparently, 7 million small businesses depend on TikTok? Who knew your cousin’s candle-making side hustle was part of the GDP?

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Flashback: Trump vs. TikTok, Round One
Let’s not forget Trump first called TikTok a “national emergency” back in 2020 and waved around another executive order threatening to ban it. Fast-forward to today, and he’s playing the hero. Is it growth? Is it strategy? Or just Trump being Trump? Either way, TikTok users are breathing a collective sigh of relief—and hitting “record” to capture every second of it.

TikTok lives another day, thanks to Trump’s dramatic day-one penmanship. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to practice my lip-sync for the next big viral trend. 🎤

Donald Trump Saves TikTok from Doom in a Blaze of Executive Order Glory – Here’s the Tea!

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