So, picture this: Dakota Johnson strolls onto the set of her short film Loser Baby feeling like she’s about to crush it. She’s got the vibe, she’s got the vision, and oh, she’s got a mysterious new drink in hand that she’s certain is filled with organic magic. “I thought it was nature in a can!” Dakota confesses. Spoiler alert: it was caffeine in disguise, plotting to turn her into a human disco ball.
In a recent chat with Variety, our girl Dakota, 34 years young, explained how she stumbled upon the mystical powers of Celsius Energy Drinks. Day one of filming and she’s like, “Oh look, a drink that says ‘Celsius.’ Probably full of, like, sunlight and kale or something, right?” WRONG. Turns out, she was swigging liquid lightning.
“I was like, ‘Wow, I’ve never felt this inspired in my life! I’m up all night thinking of the deepest, most existential stuff!’” she says, now realizing she was basically bouncing off the walls like a hyperactive squirrel. “It was because I was chugging two Celsius a day!” Yeah, two. A day. Dakota didn’t even realize she had signed up for the Energy Olympics.
“When you read the back, it’s like, ‘B12! Vitamin A! Good vibes!’” she explained. “I thought I was just getting my daily dose of ‘healthy person,’ but really, I was riding the caffeine rocket straight to the moon.”
And who had to bring Dakota back down to Earth? The costume designer. Bless her soul. She took one look at Dakota and was like, “Girl, you’re tweaking. You’re basically having a Red Bull rave in your bloodstream.”
Dakota laughed it off but, deep down, was like, “Wait… this is my origin story as the first person to overdose on vitamins??”
Reflecting on the whole thing, she jokes about how “upsetting” it was, but now? Oh, she’s ready. “Look, I’m not saying I’m proud, but I’m also saying, ‘Celsius, I see you. Let’s make this official.’ Night shoots? I’m your girl. Day shoots? Also your girl. Really, any time I need to be awake longer than the sun, I’m your gal.”
Dakota Johnson, fueled by what she thought was nature’s elixir, ends up on an accidental caffeine bender, but comes out the other side with a new superpower — eternal alertness. Also, Celsius, if you’re reading this… where’s that sponsorship?
