Hollywood veteran and gravel-voiced brooder Sean Penn has spoken: Jennifer Lawrence is it. Like, the final Pokémon evolution of movie stars. The Endgame. The Beyoncé of the big screen. According to Penn, the factory that made shiny, charming, wildly bankable stars ran out of juice right after J-Law rolled off the assembly line. He basically told us, “That’s it! No refunds, no exchanges.”
On The Louis Theroux Podcast (yes, even Louis has a podcast now — welcome to 2025), the Mystic River star waxed poetic about Jen like she was the last working lightbulb in Hollywood’s chandelier. “Probably the last movie star,” he said, as if he were Gandalf solemnly handing off the last flickering torch of charisma.
Now, in classic Sean Penn fashion, things got a little spicy — and weird. He admitted that sometimes, he watches performances by young actors so good that he considers quitting acting altogether and becoming… wait for it… an accountant. That’s right. Sean “I played Harvey Milk” Penn doing taxes in a tiny cubicle. Picture that. Take a moment.
BUT — and here’s the kicker — he was not talking about Timothée Chalamet when he said that. In fact, he straight-up confessed he’s never seen the guy act. Not in Call Me By Your Name, not in Dune, not even in that Apple TV+ ad where Timothée just stares longingly at every streaming show except his. Nothing.
So, either Sean’s been too busy watching Jennifer Lawrence fall up stairs at the Oscars on repeat, or he thinks Timothée is just a particularly stylish intern who keeps showing up to red carpets by mistake.
Meanwhile, Jennifer’s out here still proving her stardom in a new film Die, My Love, which just premiered at Cannes. No word yet on whether Penn saw it. But let’s be real — unless it has Jennifer Lawrence dramatically eating snacks while crying in a bathroom, it might not meet his exacting “movie star” criteria.
Jennifer = the final boss of fame. Timothée = still loading in Sean Penn’s mental hard drive.
