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F1 Legend Michael Schumacher’s Family Targeted in Wild Blackmail Plot—Drama So Messy It Could Be a Netflix Series

Michael Schumacher’s family has reportedly been caught up in a blackmail plot so absurd it makes soap operas look like mild documentaries. The alleged mastermind? Drumroll please—Michael’s former bodyguard, Markus Fritsche. Yes, the guy whose job was to protect him.

The Plot Thickens Like Day-Old Gravy
Here’s the tea: Fritsche allegedly helped cook up a scheme involving over 1,000 private images, videos, and medical records of the 55-year-old F1 legend. According to prosecutors, this wasn’t your run-of-the-mill mischief—it was “particularly serious.” Translation: A hot mess with a side of legal jeopardy.

For those catching up, Schumacher has stayed out of the public eye ever since a serious skiing accident in 2013, with his wife Corinne guarding his privacy like it’s the crown jewels.

But here’s the kicker—Fritsche reportedly infiltrated Team Schumacher about a year before the accident and stayed for a solid eight years. He was practically family. Then, when the Schumachers decided it was time to say, “Thanks, but no thanks,” Fritsche allegedly went from BFF to bitter ex-employee faster than you can say, “pit stop.”

A Plot Straight Out of a Budget Spy Movie
Fritsche didn’t act alone in this cinematic fiasco. Oh no, he allegedly roped in a friend, Yilmaz Tozturkan, who then brought his 30-year-old son along for the ride. Add IT guy Daniel Lins to the mix, and suddenly we’ve got a ragtag squad of amateur villains. The gang reportedly sold the stolen data to Yilmaz, who decided to cold call the Schumacher family on June 3 with a casual demand for £12 million (roughly $15 million).

Yilmaz reportedly said, “Pay up, or this stuff hits the darknet.” (Because nothing says “credible threat” like a digital ransom straight out of the dark web for dummies handbook.)

The Police: “Not on Our Watch”
The family, thankfully, didn’t flinch. Instead, the cops swooped in like a SWAT team in an action movie. Yilmaz and his son allegedly tried to sweeten the deal—or escalate it, depending on your perspective—by sending four images to Schumacher’s residence on June 11, just to say, “We mean business.”

But plot twist: These two were already under surveillance. A week later, the German police arrested the father-son duo, leaving Fritsche and IT-guy Lins to face charges for aiding and abetting this chaotic crime.

Coming Soon to a Courtroom Near You
The trial, set to start in Wuppertal, promises to be a spectacle. With the ex-bodyguard accused of aiding and abetting, and Yilmaz facing attempted extortion charges, it’s bound to be more dramatic than an F1 race in Monaco.

Moral of the story? If you’re going to attempt a blackmail plot, maybe don’t recruit your friends, their kids, and an IT guy who probably Googled “how to blackmail someone” five minutes before signing up.

Stay tuned, because this courtroom drama might just have more plot twists than a Christopher Nolan movie.

F1 Legend Michael Schumacher’s Family Targeted in Wild Blackmail Plot—Drama So Messy It Could Be a Netflix Series

Auliʻi Cravalho Buys Her Mom a House Thanks to Moana! And Yes, We’re All Crying.

Turns out, playing a Disney princess comes with some serious perks—and we’re not just talking about the free pineapple Dole Whip. Auliʻi Cravalho, the voice behind the iconic Moana, has leveled up in life big time, and she’s taking her mom along for the ride.

In a heartwarming chat with People, the 24-year-old actress-slash-singer revealed her ultimate flex: buying her mom, Puanani, a house. Yes, a whole house. Not a couch in the corner. Not a really fancy tent. A house.

From Food Stamps to Dream Homes
Before Moana was making waves (literally), life for Auliʻi and her mom was more “struggle bus” than “sailing yacht.” Raised on food stamps on Hawaii’s Big Island and Oahu, Auliʻi spilled some real talk about their one-bedroom setup in Mililani.

“I slept in the bedroom; my mom slept on the couch,” she shared. “She gave me everything.” (Cue all of us ugly crying into our Spam musubi.)

Fast-forward to post-Moana stardom, and things have changed dramatically. Thanks to the movie’s blockbuster success and Auliʻi’s undeniable talent, her mom is now living her best life in her very own house. Oh, and she’s retired. That’s right—no more alarm clocks or emails titled “per my last email.”

Auliʻi’s Thoughts on Parenthood
As if buying a house wasn’t enough of a mic drop, Auliʻi got reflective about her parents’ sacrifices. (Her mom and dad ran a construction company and divorced when she was young.)

“Your parents give you so much,” she said, undoubtedly making every parent reading this nod in agreement and side-eye their own kids. “Kids feel a little indebted, I’m going to be honest! But we feel so grateful for our parents’ sacrifices.”

Translation: She’s a Disney princess and the kind of daughter who doesn’t pretend her Venmo account “isn’t working” when her mom asks for gas money.

What’s Next for Auliʻi?
With a Moana sequel smashing box-office records, Auliʻi is on top of the world. And while we’re here freaking out over her success, she’s just busy making sure her family gets to enjoy the fruits of her labor—because that’s how real-life Disney royalty rolls.

BRB, calling our moms to tell them we love them (and maybe apologizing for eating all the snacks last Thanksgiving).

Auliʻi Cravalho Buys Her Mom a House Thanks to Moana! And Yes, We’re All Crying.

When Comedy Royalty Meets: Eddie Murphy’s Son and Martin Lawrence’s Daughter Are Engaged!

Eddie Murphy and Martin Lawrence, two of the most iconic comedy legends ever, are about to become in-laws. That’s right—Eric Murphy, Eddie’s 34-year-old son, has put a ring on Jasmin Lawrence’s finger, officially upgrading their relationship status to “comedically iconic.”

The Proposal Heard ‘Round Hollywood
Eric, the proud heir to the Murphy laugh legacy, decided to lock it down with Jasmin, Martin’s dazzling daughter, and the world collectively swooned. The big moment went down on November 27, 2024—mark it in your calendar, because this is the day two comedic dynasties united.

Jasmin shared the news on Instagram with a caption so sweet, it might give you a toothache:
“11.27.2024 We’re engaged!! God truly blessed us with a love that feels like destiny. We couldn’t be more excited for this next chapter ❤️❤️ Special thank you to everyone who made this moment so beautiful!!”

Translation: They’re cute, in love, and ready to make us all feel single. Oh, and there’s a dreamy proposal video you need to see—check it out HERE (or prepare to cry into your popcorn if you don’t have a boo).

A Love Story 3 Years in the Making
Eric and Jasmin have been serving up relationship goals since they went Instagram official back in July 2021. You know, the era of banana bread and Tiger King? Jasmin kicked it off with an adorable birthday post for Eric, making it clear these two were in it for the long haul.

Fast forward three years, and here we are—smack dab in the middle of a real-life rom-com. Someone call Netflix.

Dads React: Eddie & Martin’s Comedy Crossover
Earlier this year, Eddie Murphy spilled some tea about what it’s like having his son date Martin Lawrence’s daughter. We’re still waiting on Martin’s take, but if he’s anything like his movie roles, we’re imagining a mix of Bad Boys intensity and Big Momma sass.

Can we just take a moment to appreciate this future family dynamic? Picture Thanksgiving: Eddie cracking jokes about the turkey, Martin narrating the mashed potatoes’ journey to the table, and Eric and Jasmin just rolling their eyes. Iconic.

Congrats to the Future Mr. & Mrs. Murphy-Lawrence
So here’s to Eric and Jasmin—may their love be as strong as their dads’ box-office records and their family gatherings as legendary as a stand-up special. The bar for Hollywood couple goals has officially been raised.

P.S. We’re already waiting for the sitcom.

Khalid & Normani Are Back With a New Duet: It’s Getting Personal

Attention, anyone who still has “Love Lies” on repeat from 2018—Khalid and Normani are back! Yes, the king of smooth bops and the queen of vocal slayage have reunited for a new track, and it’s called Personal. (Spoiler alert: it’s about to get very up close and personal.)

Khalid, the 26-year-old “Young Dumb & Broke” hitmaker, and Normani, the 28-year-old icon who left Fifth Harmony and never looked back, are blessing us with another duet. Their last collab, “Love Lies,” made us all believe in love again (even if it was just with pizza), so you already know this reunion is serious.

The new single drops THIS Friday, December 6—mark your calendars, set your alarms, and maybe even your neighbor’s. Khalid teased the track on Instagram with a caption that practically screams, “Prepare to cry in the club.” He wrote:
“The door is open
You don’t even need a key
You’ve been pushing on me so relentlessly.”

It’s giving vulnerability. It’s giving drama. It’s giving, “Please let me in before my Spotify crashes from refreshing too hard.”

Normani, fresh off the success of her debut album Dopamine, is bringing the heat, as per usual. She’s been living her best life and dropping jaw-dropping performances, and now she’s ready to hit us with yet another bop.

Oh, and in case you missed it, Khalid recently came out as gay, further solidifying his role as a boundary-breaking artist who owns his truth while casually dominating the music charts. We stan.

So, grab your tissues, your dancing shoes, and maybe a stress ball for all the feelings this track will unleash. This Friday, it’s Personal. Don’t say we didn’t warn you!

Joe Biden Drops a Presidential Uno Reverse on Hunter’s Charges, Calls It ‘A Total Legal Circus’

President Joe Biden decided to pull out his metaphorical “Dad Card” and pardon his son, Hunter Biden. The move comes as the 82-year-old commander-in-chief nears the end of his term, leaving pundits, critics, and internet meme-makers with a feast of content.

A Quick Recap of the Hunter Saga
So, what exactly did Hunter do to spark this White House family reunion? Back in September 2023, Hunter was slapped with three federal charges over gun stuff—apparently owning and using one in ways that made the Feds do a double take. Fast forward to July 2024, and Hunter got a guilty verdict that came with a maximum potential sentence of 25 years behind bars and a $750,000 fine. That’s a lot of zeros.

Biden’s “Dad to the Rescue” Moment
In a statement released Sunday night (because why not drop bombshells when people are binge-watching holiday movies?), President Biden went full protective dad.
“Today, I signed a pardon for my son Hunter,” Biden declared, in what we imagine was delivered with a slow clap and possibly a tear in his eye. “From day one, I promised not to meddle with the Justice Department. But watching my kid get treated like the legal system’s favorite piñata? Yeah, I’m done playing nice.”

Hunter vs. The Justice System: A Political Soap Opera
According to Biden, Hunter’s charges didn’t exactly fall out of the sky. “This whole ordeal was cooked up by my political haters. They stirred the pot, sent subpoenas flying, and then threw a party when the plea deal fell apart,” Biden said, likely side-eying Congress so hard that even Capitol Hill felt the shade.

He also accused the system of going full-blown Shark Tank on his son, who is now five and a half years sober. “They tried to break him, and in doing so, they’ve tried to break me,” Biden explained, channeling the energy of every overprotective dad in every coming-of-age movie ever.

Mic Drop: “Enough is Enough”
Concluding his statement, Biden got straight to the point: “Enough is enough.” Translation? He’s tired of the drama, the court hearings, and probably the memes. Declaring the situation a “miscarriage of justice,” he revealed that the pardon decision came over the weekend, possibly while sipping a strong cup of coffee and muttering, “Not today, Congress. Not today.”

The Internet Reacts
As news of the pardon spreads, the internet is having a field day. Some are praising Biden for sticking up for his family, while others are rolling their eyes so hard they might need a neck brace. Either way, one thing’s for sure—this Biden family moment will go down in the history books as the ultimate presidential power play.

Today, I signed a pardon for my son Hunter. From the day I took office, I said I would not interfere with the Justice Department’s decision-making, and I kept my word even as I have watched my son being selectively, and unfairly, prosecuted. Without aggravating factors like use in a crime, multiple purchases, or buying a weapon as a straw purchaser, people are almost never brought to trial on felony charges solely for how they filled out a gun form. Those who were late paying their taxes because of serious addictions, but paid them back subsequently with interest and penalties, are typically given non-criminal resolutions. It is clear that Hunter was treated differently.

The charges in his cases came about only after several of my political opponents in Congress instigated them to attack me and oppose my election. Then, a carefully negotiated plea deal, agreed to by the Department of Justice, unraveled in the court room – with a number of my political opponents in Congress taking credit for bringing political pressure on the process. Had the plea deal held, it would have been a fair, reasonable resolution of Hunter’s cases.

No reasonable person who looks at the facts of Hunter’s cases can reach any other conclusion than Hunter was singled out only because he is my son – and that is wrong. There has been an effort to break Hunter – who has been five and a half years sober, even in the face of unrelenting attacks and selective prosecution. In trying to break Hunter, they’ve tried to break me – and there’s no reason to believe it will stop here. Enough is enough.

For my entire career I have followed a simple principle: just tell the American people the truth. They’ll be fair-minded. Here’s the truth: I believe in the justice system, but as I have wrestled with this, I also believe raw politics has infected this process and it led to a miscarriage of justice – and once I made this decision this weekend, there was no sense in delaying it further. I hope Americans will understand why a father and a President would come to this decision.

Joe Biden Drops a Presidential Uno Reverse on Hunter’s Charges, Calls It ‘A Total Legal Circus’

‘Romy & Michele’s High School Reunion 2’—Because 90s Nostalgia Never Quits!

It looks like the queens of questionable business ideas, Romy and Michele, are strapping on their platform heels for another round of retro hijinks. And the news? It’s almost as iconic as their infamous high school reunion outfits.

Mira Sorvino, a.k.a. Romy “Invented the Post-it Note” White, has given fans a juicy update that’s more exciting than finding out someone else did the actual inventing. According to People magazine, a sequel to the 1997 cult comedy classic Romy & Michele’s High School Reunion is “so close to being greenlit,” which is Hollywood-speak for, “We’re just waiting on someone to sign off on the snacks budget.”

Here’s what we know: Mira spilled the tea that a director has been locked in (we hope they appreciate hot glue and glitter), and both she and Lisa Kudrow (our beloved Michele “I’m the Mary” Weinberger) are all in as executive producers. Oh, and guess who else is back? The OG screenwriter, Robin Schiff! She’s apparently been busy writing “multiple drafts of an amazing funny script,” which we assume includes at least one epic interpretive dance scene.

But wait, there’s more! Mira confirmed that nearly every single character from the original is penciled in to return. Yes, every single one. (We’re looking at you, Janeane Garofalo and your eternally angsty cigarette.) Of course, there’s always that fine print—deals need to be made, contracts need signing, and someone has to make sure Alan Cumming’s time machine is fully operational.

The best part? Mira hinted that filming could kick off as early as the second quarter of next year. That means we’re potentially just months away from seeing what Romy and Michele have been up to since their last reunion. Have they leveled up their lies? Are they still rocking matching feather boas? And most importantly, has Sandy Frink’s fortune doubled again?

But let’s not get too carried away. Mira was quick to remind us that while the project is tantalizingly close, it’s not officially a go yet. “I can’t say that it’s officially greenlit,” she teased. Translation: Someone needs to dust off a giant rubber stamp and make it happen already!

For the uninitiated (where have you been, under a rock glued with non-Post-it adhesive?), the original movie followed Romy and Michele as they returned to their 10-year high school reunion in Tucson, Arizona. Determined to one-up their former classmates and bullies, they spun a web of fabulous lies about their “success” (spoiler: they didn’t invent Post-its, but they did invent friendship goals). The star-studded cast included Janeane Garofalo, Alan Cumming, Camryn Manheim, Elaine Hendrix, and Justin Theroux, plus enough quotable one-liners to fuel a thousand TikToks.

So, buckle up, 90s kids and fans of quirky comedy. The reunion might not be officially official yet, but it’s shaping up to be as epic as Romy and Michele’s businesswoman dance. Until then, start practicing your best “What a cute outfit! Where’d you get it?” comeback.

“Moana 2” Breaks Records Like a Coconut at a Luau—Here’s Every Insane Milestone It Smashed!

Moana 2 just surfed into theaters and wrecked the box office harder than Maui smashed his hook. The sequel opened with a domestic 5-day debut of $221 million—yes, you read that right, TWO-HUNDRED-AND-TWENTY-ONE MILLION DOLLARS. Somebody at Disney is definitely popping champagne in their Moana-themed jammies.

This cinematic tsunami didn’t just break records; it obliterated them. It snagged the title for:
– Biggest 5-day opening of all time (take that, Mario and your mushrooms).
– Biggest Thanksgiving weekend in history, both 3-day and 5-day (Frozen who? Exactly).
– Biggest Thanksgiving Day and Black Friday ever. Basically, the movie left no holiday safe from its dominance.

Globally, Moana and Maui’s latest adventure sailed past $386 million in just a weekend. That’s the second-biggest global debut of 2024, proving that people worldwide still can’t resist a Polynesian princess, a cheeky demigod, and some catchy tunes.

What’s the Plot?
Auli‘i Cravalho and Dwayne “The Rock Who Sings” Johnson are back as Moana and Maui, embarking on a brand-new adventure three years after the events of the first film. (Spoiler: Maui still can’t stop bragging about himself, and Moana is still the ocean’s favorite child.)

Disney’s Reaction: Giddy as Hei Hei on a Sugar High
“Moana 2 crushed even our wildest expectations,” Disney Entertainment Co-Chairman Alan Bergman said while probably wearing a lei and sipping a piña colada. He praised the creative team, stars, and new music, adding, “This is a moment to celebrate!” We’re guessing he did exactly that with a conga line through the Disney offices.

The Numbers That’ll Make You Say, “What Can’t They Do?”
Domestic Records:
– Biggest 5-day opening ever: Bye, Super Mario Bros.! Hope you packed a lunch for second place.
– Thanksgiving weekend domination: $221 million in 5 days? Frozen 2 wishes it could pull those numbers.
– $28 million on Thanksgiving Day: Turkey, pie, and Moana = the holy trinity.
– $54.5 million on Black Friday: Shoppers were like, “Skip the mall, let’s sail to the theater!”
– Biggest debut ever for Walt Disney Animation Studios: Yeah, it even dunked on Frozen.

International Flex:
– France went bananas, giving Moana 2 the biggest animated opening ever.
– Italy and Brazil said, “Second-biggest animated weekend? Fine, but we’re still obsessed!”
– Latin America collectively yelled, “We love you, Moana!” breaking records in nearly 30 countries.

Disney’s Triple Crown Year
2024 is officially the Year of Disney. With Moana 2, Deadpool & Wolverine ($211M), and Inside Out 2 ($155M) all pulling insane numbers, the House of Mouse basically owns the box office.

If you haven’t seen Moana 2, what are you waiting for? The ocean’s calling, and apparently, so are record-breaking ticket sales. 🌊

Will Ferrell Gets All Warm and Fuzzy Reflecting on Elf’s Legacy, Two Decades Later

It’s been over 20 years since Elf hit our screens, and Will Ferrell is still out here spreading holiday cheer like Buddy the Elf hopped up on maple syrup spaghetti. The 57-year-old comedy icon recently took a moment to bask in the candy-cane glow of his Elf legacy, and honestly, it sounds like the guy is just as enchanted by the movie as we are.

“It’s really quite special,” Ferrell told People, probably while wearing a jaunty green and yellow elf hat (okay, maybe not, but let’s imagine). “I mean, it continues to grow by leaps and bounds.” Did you catch that? Leaps and bounds! The man is basically describing Elf like it’s a toddler discovering gravity.

And he’s not wrong—Buddy’s unshakable holiday spirit has taken root deep in our collective holiday hearts. “It’s kind of entrenched itself as a holiday classic,” Ferrell said, which feels like an understatement. Entrenched? Buddy the Elf didn’t just “entrench”; he grabbed the holidays by the snowballs and screamed, “The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear!”

But the real kicker? People are watching Elf year-round. Yep, you heard that right. Will explained, “I have people come up to me saying, ‘We watch Elf on July 4th. We just love it.’” Fireworks, BBQ, and a grown man in tights chugging Coke? Sounds like peak Americana to me.

Reflecting on this unseasonal love, Ferrell mused, “You never really have an idea of what’s going to land with people.” Translation: Sometimes, you think you’re making a weird little Christmas movie, and two decades later, folks are chanting “Santa! I know him!” in August.

Ferrell summed it up perfectly: “This movie continues to resonate in a way that’s pretty incredible.” And honestly, who can argue with that? Whether it’s December or the dead of summer, Elf isn’t just a movie—it’s a lifestyle. Pass the syrup.

The Simpsons’ Crystal Ball Strikes Again: Producer Spills the Beans on Their Funniest Prediction

The Simpsons, a show so eerily good at predicting the future that it probably freaks out fortune tellers, is at it again—or rather, has always been. Producer David Mirkin recently spilled some behind-the-scenes tea about the funniest prediction they’ve ever made, and honestly, it’s pure gold.

During a chat with The Post at Vulture Festival, Mirkin, who’s been cranking out laughs for decades, shared what still has the writers doing spit-takes to this day.

“Okay, hands down, predicting Donald Trump as president is one of the most hilarious things we’ve ever done,” Mirkin confessed, possibly while fighting back both laughter and a single tear.

But here’s where things go full X-Files. When pressed about the show’s uncanny knack for seeing into the future, Mirkin didn’t hold back. “Alright, this is kind of a hush-hush thing,” he said, leaning in like he was about to share the Colonel’s secret recipe. “People always ask how we do it. Well…sometimes, time travelers pop into the writers’ room, drop some juicy tidbits, and bounce. Honestly, they just want to mess with everyone’s heads. It’s genius, and frankly, I support it.”

The Simpsons isn’t just a cartoon; it’s apparently a side hustle for time-traveling pranksters. And predicting Trump? That’s just them flexing. Classic Simpsons.

Soap Star to Ranch Legend: Wayne Northrop Passes Away at 77, Leaving Soap Opera Fans and Cows Mourning

Wayne Northrop, a soap opera icon and occasional ranch whisperer, has passed away at the age of 77. Known for gracing TV screens with his dramatic stares and brooding monologues in Days of Our Lives and Dynasty, Northrop shuffled off this mortal coil on Friday (November 29). His publicist confirmed the news to Deadline, likely while holding back a single, dramatic tear in true soap opera style.

Alzheimer’s Diagnosis: A Plot Twist Nobody Wanted
Wayne’s wife, Lynn Herring Northrop—who moonlights as a General Hospital star—shared a heartfelt statement about his journey. She revealed that Wayne was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s six years ago, which sadly wasn’t the kind of plot twist fans are used to cheering for.

“He took his last breath surrounded by family,” Lynn shared, painting a picture of love, support, and no fewer than 43 years of wedded bliss. “Wayne touched so many lives with his humor and wit. He was a husband, a dad, a rancher, and probably a cow’s favorite human being.”

Yes, this soap star had layers—like an onion, or perhaps a well-written daytime drama character.

From Soap Operas to Saddles
Wayne’s resume is what Hollywood dreams are made of. He played Roman Brady on Days of Our Lives from 1981 to 1984, a role so iconic it boomeranged back to him in the ’90s. When producers recast him as Dr. Alex North in 2005, they used footage from his Roman days to weave an absurdly complicated backstory because… soap operas.

Fans of Dynasty might remember him as Michael Culhane, a suave chauffeur who probably knew more about Blake Carrington’s drama than anyone with a car key should. He also dipped his toes into Port Charles as Rex Stanton and popped up in hits like L.A. Law and Cold Case. Basically, if a show had a title, Wayne probably guest-starred on it.

Drama On-Screen and Off
Wayne’s passing comes not long after the death of Days co-star Drake Hogestyn, who played John Black—a character so layered he was once mistaken for Roman Brady after some light brainwashing and an extreme makeover. (Honestly, who among us hasn’t had a similar identity crisis?)

Cowboy Hats Off to You, Wayne
While Wayne was a master of soap opera drama, he was also a dedicated rancher, spending his downtime bonding with cows, probably discussing plotlines and asking why they weren’t watching his shows.

So, let’s pour one out for Wayne Northrop—a man who made us believe in the power of soap opera amnesia, convoluted backstories, and the healing power of humor. May his legacy live on in daytime TV reruns and mooing cattle everywhere.

Our thoughts are with Wayne’s family, fans, and bovine besties during this time.

Soap Star to Ranch Legend: Wayne Northrop Passes Away at 77, Leaving Soap Opera Fans and Cows Mourning

Demi Moore Thought Ghost Might Go BOO-tastrophe But Ended Up Spooking Us All in the Best Way

Demi Moore, Hollywood icon and eternal keeper of 90s bangs perfection, spilled some saucy tea while munching on even saucier wings during her recent stop at Hot Ones. Because why just cry over a pottery wheel when you can cry over a jalapeño-laced meltdown, right?

While Sean Evans kept the heat coming (literally), Demi dove headfirst into the fiery chat and let us in on her unique career philosophy: big risks = big rewards (or colossal chaos). Case in point? Her legendary movie Ghost, which nearly made her believe she was starring in a potential cinematic car crash.

“It had all these different genres mashed together,” Demi said, casually nibbling on what we assume was a wing hotter than Patrick Swayze in 1990. “I mean, romance, thriller, comedy, ghost pottery lessons? I thought, ‘This could either make everyone cry into their popcorn or explode into a f—ing disaster.’” Imagine almost being the face of a disaster where ghosts flirt through clay and Whoopi Goldberg out-sasses spirits!

But Demi wasn’t scared of a gamble—oh no! “That’s the kind of thing that makes you roll the dice. Step in. Risk it all. Pray that the ghost doesn’t actually haunt you,” she joked (probably). Spoiler: the dice rolled right into box office history.

Demi didn’t stop there—she got philosophical, waxing poetic about the future of cinema like it was her next Oscar-worthy monologue. “I think we’re all Netflix zombies now. The risk is losing the cinema experience, and let’s be real, nothing beats a sticky theater floor and popcorn fights,” she said, basically calling us all out.

Sure, she loves streaming—who doesn’t enjoy watching Indecent Proposal for the 74th time while in pajamas? But she hopes we can all find a way to stumble back into theaters for that magical communal experience. You know, where you awkwardly cry together over a ghost saying “ditto.”

Demi Moore—forever the queen of risk, romance, and reminding us all that sometimes, disaster-level risks make movie magic. Or, in her words, “Roll the dice, and maybe you’ll end up a timeless classic. Or at least covered in hot sauce on YouTube.”

Justin Timberlake Cancels Another Concert: Back Pain Strikes a Choreographed Blow!

Justin Timberlake’s The Forget Tomorrow World Tour just hit another speed bump—this time courtesy of his very own spine. Yep, the man who once brought “SexyBack” is now bringing… an ice pack.

Over the weekend, Justin, 43, dropped some unfortunate news on his Instagram Story, which is the 2024 equivalent of a medieval town crier yelling, “Hear ye, hear ye!” He regretfully announced that his December 2 concert in Oklahoma City is officially canceled due to a back injury sustained in New Orleans.

“I’m so sorry, Oklahoma City,” Justin wrote, probably while grimacing into one of those ergonomic pillows. “I have to cancel the show on 12/2. I hurt my back in NOLA, and my doctors are like, ‘Dude, sit down already.’” Okay, he didn’t exactly say that last part, but the message was clear: the back that once shimmied its way through Bye Bye Bye is now saying “Bye-bye, Paycom Center.”

From Dance Moves to Doctor’s Orders
Justin’s last show was November 25 in New Orleans, which clearly took a toll. Did he pull a muscle while showing off those iconic moves? Or did he throw out his back reaching for his Justified album to remind everyone he’s been slaying since 2002? The world may never know. What we do know is that his doctors have benched him for the time being.

“Y’all know I hate doing this,” Justin added, probably with the same pouty face he made in The Social Network. But hey, better a canceled show than a Timberlake doing the robot in a neck brace.

The Oklahoma Blues
Fans in Oklahoma are understandably crushed. The Paycom Center was ready to host a night of nostalgia, falsetto, and man of the woods vibes. Now? Just an empty stage and a city humming Cry Me a River in collective despair.

But fear not, Houston! Justin is still scheduled to perform on December 4. That is, assuming his back doesn’t file a formal complaint first.

The Year of “Timber-late” Shows
This isn’t the first time the tour has hit a snag. Back in October, Justin postponed six shows due to an illness. At this rate, his tour should be renamed The Forget Tomorrow and Maybe Next Week Tour.

Here’s hoping for a speedy recovery, JT. After all, the world needs more dance moves, fewer doctor’s notes, and at least one more chance to yell, “It’s gonna be me!” at a live show. Get well soon, Justin—and don’t forget to stretch!

Justin Timberlake Cancels Another Concert: Back Pain Strikes a Choreographed Blow!

Jordana Brewster Honors Paul Walker with a Touching Tribute—And Feels All the Feels

Jordana Brewster, queen of grace and speed herself, took a pit stop on Instagram this Saturday (November 30) to pay tribute to her Fast & Furious co-star Paul Walker. Why? Because it’s been 11 years since we tragically lost him, and let’s be real—he’ll forever be family.

The 44-year-old actress kicked things off with some raw honesty:
“I woke up so edgy today. Annoyed by EVERY. Little. Thing,” she confessed. (We’ve all been there—like when your Wi-Fi buffers mid-binge or your coffee is mysteriously decaf). Then it hit her like a Vin Diesel monologue: “Someone isn’t here who should be.”

Cue the gut punch. Jordana reminisced about Paul, calling him that guy. You know, the one who made everyone feel like they were in a NOS-powered hug. “The one that lifted up everyone around him,” she wrote. “The one who worked his ass off but didn’t let it show. The one with grace and humor.” (Translation: a real-life unicorn in cargo shorts.)

She ended her heartfelt post with: “#11years Miss you forever @paulwalker,” because how else do you wrap up a message that heavy? Oh, and she shouted out Paul’s daughter, Meadow Walker, saying, “@meadowwalker is carrying on your legacy through her beauty and strength.” Basically, Meadow is out here making Paul proud while also casually being flawless.

And if that wasn’t enough to get the waterworks flowing, Jordana included some old-school pics of her and Paul, back when life was simpler, hair gel was plentiful, and everything smelled faintly of motor oil.

Meadow slid into the comments to drop a sweet “I love you ❤️,” proving that this bond isn’t just Fast, it’s also Furious-ly strong.

As a reminder (not that we need one), Paul tragically passed away on November 30, 2013, at just 40 years old. While his loss still hits like a tire blowout, Jordana and the Fast fam keep his memory alive—one heartfelt post and epic car chase at a time.

James Van Der Beek’s Varsity Blues Merch Drop: When Life Gives You Cancer, Sell Jerseys!

James Van Der Beek, aka the guy who *still* doesn’t want your life from Varsity Blues, is turning his iconic ’90s football persona into a fundraising quarterback. Why? Because stage 3 colorectal cancer doesn’t just tackle you emotionally—it also sacks your wallet.

The 47-year-old Dawson’s Creek alum (and permanent resident of our nostalgic hearts) recently got real on Instagram about his 2023 cancer diagnosis and the very un-chill costs of treatment. His solution? A merch drop worthy of a Friday Night Lights cameo.

James has released autographed replicas of his character Jonathan “Mox” Moxon’s #4 jersey from the 1999 cult classic Varsity Blues. And no, these aren’t your average dusty attic finds. These babies are limited edition and come with the authenticity of James’s actual Sharpie skills.

“Merch drop!” he hyped on Instagram, likely in the same voice he uses to tell his kids it’s time for ice cream. “Excited to celebrate the 25th anniversary of #VarsityBlues with a limited edition #4 Moxon jersey—each one personally autographed by me.”

And because James knows how to tug on your heartstrings (as well as your wallet), he added: “100% of my net proceeds will go to families recovering from the financial burden of cancer (including my own 😇).” That’s right, guys: buying a jersey is basically a charitable act and a nostalgic flex all rolled into one.

To really sell the vibe, James included photos and videos of himself rocking the jersey, reminding us all that he still looks like the high school QB who somehow managed to avoid aging. And because he’s a marketing genius, he dropped the perfect holiday pitch: “Order now & get a signed one in time for Christmas,” accompanied by the hashtag that says it all: #CancerIsExpensive.

So, whether you’re looking for a unique holiday gift, a way to help a beloved ’90s icon tackle cancer, or just want to feel like you’re on the Varsity Blues sidelines, grab your jersey. As Mox would say, “It’s your life now!” 🏈🎄

Sean Penn, 64, Shows Off New Girlfriend, 30, at Marrakech Film Festival – And Drops Some Spicy Opinions Along the Way

Sean Penn has officially entered his I’m-still-young-enough-to-pull-this-off era, strutting onto the red carpet at the 2024 Marrakech International Film Festival arm-in-arm with his stunning girlfriend, Valeria Nicov. Sean, dressed in a navy suit that screamed “I had this tailored yesterday,” stood next to Valeria, who brought old-Hollywood glamour in a strapless black gown that probably cost more than most of us make in a year.

Let’s set the scene: The festival is buzzing, cameras are flashing, and Sean Penn isn’t just here to look good. Oh no, Sean Penn came with a message—and, of course, his trademark I’m-gonna-say-something-unfiltered energy.

During the event, where he received a career award (because let’s face it, Sean Penn is that guy in Hollywood), he dropped this nugget: “Be as politically incorrect as your heart desires.” Cue the gasps, the applause, and possibly a few people clutching their pearls.

Sean, never one to miss an opportunity to turn a speech into a manifesto, referenced the 2018 “Munk Debate” where Stephen Fry roasted liberals for losing their chill. Naturally, Sean spun this into a call for diversity of opinion—because what’s a fancy film festival without a side of intellectual hot takes?

“Around the world, there’s this demand for diversity,” Sean said, pausing for dramatic effect. “But not diversity of behavior or opinion. I say, let’s shake things up. Be bold. Tell your stories. And while we’re at it, maybe we can stop pretending to all like kale.” Okay, he didn’t say the last part, but the vibe was there.

Now, back to Sean and Valeria. Details about their relationship are as mysterious as Sean’s skincare routine (seriously, how does he still look like this?). The couple was first spotted locking lips on a sunny Spanish vacation—because apparently, PDA in Spain is the new Hollywood soft launch.

So, what’s next for Sean and Valeria? More red carpets? More deeply philosophical speeches? Or perhaps just a quiet night in, debating whether political correctness really is overrated. Either way, Sean Penn is living his best life, and honestly, we’re just here for the entertainment.

Sean Penn, 64, Shows Off New Girlfriend, 30, at Marrakech Film Festival – And Drops Some Spicy Opinions Along the Way

Jacob Elordi’s American Psycho Rumor Mill and Global Acting Dreams: A Hilarious Breakdown

Jacob Elordi, aka the tall drink of Australian water from Euphoria, has finally addressed the internet’s latest obsession: is he set to wield an axe (or maybe a designer chainsaw) in Luca Guadagnino’s American Psycho reboot? Spoiler alert: he’s as clueless as the rest of us, but at least he’s charming about it.

“American Psycho 2.0?” More Like, “American What Now?”
Back in October, whispers about a new American Psycho project under the direction of Luca Guadagnino—known for sexy, artsy vibes in Call Me By Your Name and Challengers—set social media ablaze. Would this not-a-remake of Christian Bale’s 2000 cult classic feature Jacob? Could we handle another version of that business card scene? The drama!

At the Marrakech International Film Festival, where Jacob was rubbing elbows with Luca and Andrew Garfield (imagine the jawline power in that room), he was cornered about the rumor. His response? A casual “That’s news to me,” followed by a cheeky grin that probably launched a thousand TikToks. Variety reported this with the gravitas of a breaking story, because Jacob’s smile is apparently front-page news now.

Jacob’s Life Ambition: Become Cinema’s Most Eligible Passport Stamp
While dodging American Psycho questions like a pro, Jacob dropped a major bombshell: he’s not just in it for the Netflix paychecks. His dream is to work with filmmakers from every single country. “Cinema is this grand universal language,” he mused, sounding like he’s auditioning for a role as Hollywood’s newest philosopher king.

But let’s break this down—does this mean we could see Jacob in a Bollywood dance number? A gritty Scandinavian noir? A Japanese anime dub? Someone greenlight a global Euphoria spinoff starring Jacob already.

Bearded and Bottega: Jacob’s Red Carpet Glow-Up
Speaking of global domination, Jacob debuted a very serious new look at the festival—a beard so majestic it deserves its own IMDb page. He paired it with a swoon-worthy Bottega Veneta ensemble while attending a tribute to Sean Penn. Whether the beard is for a role or just Jacob living his lumberjack fantasy remains unclear, but it’s giving major “Don’t ask me about Patrick Bateman” vibes.

The Takeaway
So, is Jacob Elordi the next American Psycho? Probably not. But is he out here charming his way across international film festivals, making cryptic comments, and rocking designer suits? Absolutely. In the meantime, let’s all manifest his global filmmaking dream and start petitioning for him to star in everything from K-dramas to French art house films. And maybe invest in some beard oil, just in case he’s starting a trend.

Jacob Elordi’s American Psycho Rumor Mill and Global Acting Dreams: A Hilarious Breakdown

Kacey Musgraves Meets Tampa’s Most “Hands-On” Fan During Concert

Kacey Musgraves just proved that even in the middle of a show, you never know when life is going to hand (or grab) you a surprise. The 36-year-old country queen behind hits like “Deeper Well” had an up-close-and-too-personal moment with a fan during her performance at Tampa’s Amalie Arena on Friday night (November 29).

According to footage snagged by TMZ (because, of course, TMZ), Kacey was dazzling her fans up front when one overly enthusiastic concertgoer decided it was time for some unsolicited audience participation. They reached out and grabbed her hand—because apparently, a simple wave wasn’t nearly dramatic enough.

Despite the surprise physical contact, Kacey kept it professional… for about three seconds. Then she let the Tampa Tactile Enthusiast know exactly how she felt, dropping some very on-brand commentary: “What the f-ck” and “Jesus f-cking Christ.” A true poet, even in the heat of irritation.

She powered through the show like a champ, which is probably why she’s Kacey Musgraves and not just some local karaoke night hopeful. For those keeping tabs, Kacey’s been on tour with her dreamy setlist alongside Lord Huron and Nickel Creek, proving she can handle unpredictable fans and deliver flawless performances.

Moral of the story? If you’re going to a Kacey Musgraves concert, keep your hands to yourself—unless you want a front-row seat to her unfiltered reactions.

Donna Kelce’s Hallmark Acting Debut: Tackling Christmas Movies Like a Pro

Move over, Mariah Carey—Donna Kelce is coming for your Christmas queen crown! The proud mama of NFL superstars Travis and Jason Kelce is trading football fields for feel-good Hallmark vibes in Christmas on Call and Holiday Touchdown: A Chiefs Love Story. Spoiler alert: she’s repping both her sons’ teams and melting hearts along the way.

Let’s break it down: Donna is the MVP of multitasking this holiday season. In Christmas on Call, she’s all about the Eagles (shoutout to Jason’s former stomping grounds), while Holiday Touchdown gives her a chance to cheer for Travis’ Kansas City Chiefs. Forget team rivalries—this woman just made co-parenting look like an Olympic sport with Hallmark as her referee.

Donna’s Red Carpet Play-by-Play
Talking to People about her acting debut, Donna gushed, “It was so awesome!” (Translation: “I crushed it.”) She didn’t just learn the ropes; she tackled them. “There were so many fantastic veterans of Hallmark movies, and I just had a blast learning from all of them.” AKA, she was out there earning her acting stripes while sipping hot cocoa and probably baking cookies on set because Hallmark runs on sugar, snowflakes, and mom energy.

Donna also gave a special shoutout to Kansas City, where she’s basically honorary royalty. “It’s so much fun to be in Kansas City at Christmastime,” she said, probably wearing Chiefs red while dodging snowflakes like a pro. Fun fact: she’s been a regular at Arrowhead Stadium for 11 years, which is longer than some Hallmark movies even stay on air.

Grandkids = Donna’s Biggest Critics
After Christmas on Call aired, Donna revealed her toughest audience yet: Jason’s three little girls, Wyatt, Elliotte, and Bennett. Apparently, these tiny critics were OBSESSED. “They kept saying, ‘Play it back! Play it back!’” she shared, proving Donna Kelce’s acting chops are grandkid-approved.

Bonus Star Power: Donna + Taylor Swift
As if her Hallmark debut wasn’t iconic enough, Donna casually rolled up to the Chiefs game last Friday with none other than Taylor Swift. Yep, T-Swizzle herself. Donna’s basically living in a real-life Hallmark movie where the plot is “NFL mom becomes America’s sweetheart and also befriends a global pop superstar.”

Mark Your Calendars
Don’t miss Donna in Holiday Touchdown: A Chiefs Love Story this Saturday at 8/7c on Hallmark Channel. (It’s probably a lot like the Super Bowl but with more mistletoe and less tackling.) And if you missed Christmas on Call, no worries—it’s re-airing Sunday at 12/11c. Grab your eggnog and settle in because Donna Kelce is about to jingle bell rock your holiday season.

Game. Set. Match. Donna wins Christmas. 🎄

Frankie Muniz Spills the Tea: Bryan Cranston Is Basically the World’s Most Wholesome TV Dad IRL

Cue the nostalgic theme music because this is the feel-good story we all need today.

Frankie Muniz—yes, the pint-sized genius from Malcolm in the Middle who somehow managed to keep his family from total chaos every week—is giving us the inside scoop on his bromance with Bryan Cranston. Spoiler alert: it’s adorable.

While Malcolm in the Middle wrapped up its wild seven-season run in 2006 (R.I.P. to Dewey’s piano solos), Frankie and Bryan have kept the family vibes going strong. According to Frankie, his former TV dad is still playing the role of a doting father—but this time, it’s via texts and surprise pop-ins.

Cranston: The Hollywood Dad We All Want
“He still reaches out to me every couple of weeks to check in,” Frankie said, in what we assume was the most wholesome tone imaginable. Imagine your phone buzzing, and it’s Bryan Cranston asking, “Hey champ, how’s life?” That’s Frankie’s reality.

But Bryan doesn’t stop at casual texts. No sir. He’s pulling up to Frankie’s NASCAR races and even moshing at his band’s shows. Yes, Frankie has a band. Yes, Bryan Cranston is in the crowd. Is your dad even trying?

“He’s such an inspiration,” Frankie gushed. “He’s essentially like a Hollywood god at this point.” And honestly? Facts. The man went from sitcom dad to Breaking Bad legend to “still cooler than everyone else’s dad.” Bryan Cranston is peak dad energy, and we’re here for it.

Muniz: From Middle Child to NASCAR Hotshot
While Cranston is busy collecting Emmys and starring in everything good on TV, Frankie has taken a hard left turn (literally). He’s now speeding through life as a NASCAR driver. That’s right, Frankie Muniz traded in the Hollywood lights for the roar of the track.

In case you missed it, the former child star signed a full-time racing contract with Reaume Brothers Racing for the 2025 NASCAR Craftsman Truck Series. So, if you ever thought your childhood faves were slacking, Frankie is out here living two dream lives while Bryan Cranston cheers him on.

Final Thoughts
The real question is: when do we get a buddy movie about Frankie and Bryan’s IRL relationship? Picture it—Bryan as the wise mentor, Frankie as the plucky racer, and some shenanigans involving an RV and a road trip. Hollywood, make it happen.

For now, we’ll just bask in the knowledge that the Malcolm in the Middle family is still thriving, with Cranston proving once again why he’s the ultimate TV dad—on and off the screen.

Frankie Muniz Spills the Tea: Bryan Cranston Is Basically the World’s Most Wholesome TV Dad IRL

Zayn Malik Honors ‘Brother’ Liam Payne with Emotional Song Dedication in Late Singer’s Hometown

Zayn Malik just served us a feels banquet we weren’t ready for. On Friday night (November 29), the 31-year-old crooner known for his angelic falsetto and smoldering stares made hearts ache during his Stairway to the Sky Tour stop in Wolverhampton, England. Why? Because Zayn took a moment to pay tribute to his “brother,” the late Liam Payne, in the most tear-jerking way possible.

Before launching into a soulful rendition of “It’s You”—a song so moody it could make a stone cry—Zayn decided to share a few heartfelt words. And boy, were they a gut punch.

“So, I’ve been doing this thing at the end of every show,” Zayn began, standing there looking like the embodiment of brooding art. “And it’s dedicated to my brother, Liam Payne.” Cue the audience bursting into cheers, screams, and probably a few sobs because directioner emotions are no joke.

But Zayn wasn’t done. Oh no. He continued, “Rest in peace. I hope you see this,” sending every single soul in that arena directly to Heartbreak Hotel. “We’re in your hometown tonight, Wolverhampton. This is for you, Liam. Here’s another song, ‘It’s You.’

The crowd’s reaction was a mix of “Oh my gosh, Zayn’s voice is a warm hug from the universe” and “Pass the tissues, this is too much.” And then he sang, pouring out emotion like he was trying to single-handedly refill the Earth’s tear reservoirs.

This deeply touching moment comes after the shocking news that Liam tragically passed away on October 16, following a devastating fall from a hotel balcony in Buenos Aires, Argentina. He, like Zayn, was just 31 years old.

Zayn’s tribute wasn’t just a performance—it was a soul-stirring reminder of the bond that can never be broken, even by tragedy. Wolverhampton will never forget that night, and neither will we. Bravo, Zayn, for turning your concert into a love letter to your fallen bandmate. 💔

Ian Harding’s Holiday Hustle: Why He’s the Procrastinating King of Christmas Decor

Ian Harding, beloved Hallmark heartthrob and Netflix charmer, has officially claimed the title of Last-Minute Christmas Decorator Extraordinaire. Forget decking the halls all December long—this guy doesn’t even touch a wreath until December 23, and honestly? Iconic.

While juggling his festive projects, the Hallmark+ series Holidazed and Netflix’s Our Little Secret, Ian spilled his hilariously relatable holiday habits. Turns out, he’s not exactly Clark Griswold. “I’m not big on lights outside,” Ian told Us Weekly. Why? Because he’s haunted by the most festive of fears: electrical fires.

“At least that’s the paranoid part of me,” he admitted with a laugh, because nothing says “Merry Christmas” like imagining your house going up in flames.

But don’t think Ian’s home is a total Grinch zone. “I’m big on indoor wreaths and bells,” he shared, adding that his dogs, Mochi and Bailey, are not fans of his jingling decor choices. “It drives our dogs nuts,” Ian said, probably while their canine protests played in the background. Oh, and did we mention he and wife Sophie Hart are also wrangling a toddler born in September 2022? Forget Santa—that is the real MVP energy.

Now, let’s talk about his timeline. While the rest of us are frantically untangling lights in early December, Ian’s decorations don’t even see daylight until December 23. Why? Because life is busy, and sometimes Christmas sneaks up on you like a rogue elf. “We just have so much going on that we’re like, ‘Oh my God! Christmas is next week. Oh, OK,’” Ian said. Cue the frantic ornament hanging and probably a lot of creative excuses for skipping outdoor lights.

Ian Harding, the holiday hero who’s proving that even if you’re two days out from Christmas, you can still bring the cheer—just maybe skip the fire hazard. 🎄

Ian Harding’s Holiday Hustle: Why He’s the Procrastinating King of Christmas Decor

Bob Bryar, My Chemical Romance Drummer, Passes Away at 44: A Tragic Loss for Emo Royalty

In a deeply somber note that feels like the first track of an emo album, Bob Bryar, former drummer for My Chemical Romance (aka MCR, aka the soundtrack to your middle school eyeliner phase), has passed away at the age of 44.

According to reports from TMZ (because even death loves a tabloid headline), Bob was found in his Tennessee home after being last seen alive on November 4. His untimely passing was discovered when animal control was called in to rescue two dogs from the premises—a plot twist that might have been a B-side on The Black Parade.

The cause of death remains a mystery, much like where all our Hot Topic wallets from 2007 went. But authorities are clear: no foul play. Bob’s stash of music equipment and weapons were untouched—because, apparently, not even death messes with a musician’s gear.

Bob’s journey into the world of My Chemical Romance is the stuff of emo legend. In 2004, while touring with The Used as a sound engineer (yes, the other band you cried to in high school), he met the MCR crew. The connection clicked harder than a kick drum, and he soon replaced original drummer Matt Pelissier just in time to ride the wave of Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge.

Bryar played a pivotal role in MCR’s history, contributing to iconic albums like The Black Parade (the unofficial national anthem for every sad kid with a dream) and Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys (the album where we all said, “Wait, is this… fun?”). He also lent his talent to Conventional Weapons, a compilation that proved even MCR’s leftovers were better than most bands’ main courses.

Though he left the band in 2010—three years before MCR’s temporary breakup shattered collective teenage souls—Bob’s impact on the emo scene remains undeniable.

Fans, former bandmates, and those who still secretly own a Black Parade hoodie mourn the loss of a talented drummer who gave us the heartbeat to some of the most iconic anthems of our youth.

Rest in peace, Bob. May your drumsticks always stay unbroken, your eyeliner forever smudge-free, and your memory live on in every air drum solo during Welcome to the Black Parade.

Bob Bryar, My Chemical Romance Drummer, Passes Away at 44: A Tragic Loss for Emo Royalty

Kesha’s New Song “Delusional” is Basically an Ex Roast in Melody Form

Kesha is back, y’all! And she didn’t come to play—she came to slay. Her new single “Delusional” just dropped, and let’s just say, her ex better have some ice on standby because these lyrics are straight-up scorching.

The 37-year-old icon blessed us with this track on Friday (November 29), exactly five months after she let us all take a “JOYRIDE.” Honestly, she’s giving us the emotional rollercoaster we never asked for but desperately needed. edit

New Label, New Era, Same Savage Kesha
This song is Kesha’s second post-Dr. Luke emancipation anthem, and she’s clearly thriving. On release day, she posted a selfie captioned, “Happy delusional day to everybody except for my ex.” Iconic. Who needs Hallmark cards when you’ve got Kesha-level shade?

The Lyrics: A Love Letter to “Boy, Bye” 💔✌️
Let’s talk about these lyrics, shall we?
Baby, you’re delusional / Thinking you could ever find / Somethin’ that’s as beautiful / Someone with a love like mine.”

Translation: “You fumbled the bag, and I hope it haunts you.”

She goes on:
I’m sick of the fightin’, sick of the climbin’ / You made me hate this town.
Oof. Someone get her ex a map, because he’s lost—and also officially unwelcome in Kesha’s zip code.

Live Performances: The Holiday Roast Tour 🎤✨
If you’re in Boston (December 15) or Washington, D.C. (December 17), you’re in for a treat! Kesha will be performing at the iHeartRadio Jingle Ball Tour, and we’re pretty sure her ex is going to be the uninvited ghost of Christmas past in every note.

Looking Ahead: Kesha’s World Domination Continues 🌎👑
Oh, and as if “Delusional” wasn’t enough to keep us entertained, Kesha’s out here casually launching her own record label and gearing up for a new album in 2025. Basically, she’s booked, blessed, and better than ever.

Final Thought: Exes Beware
Moral of the story? If you date Kesha, don’t mess it up. Otherwise, you might find yourself immortalized in a pop anthem—and not in a good way.

Stream “Delusional” now, and don’t forget to send a little “thank you” card to her ex for inspiring this banger. 🎶🔥

Angelina Jolie Spills the Tea on Playing Maleficent Again

Angelina Jolie is talking about her infamous winged baddie, Maleficent, and whether she’s ready to swoop back onto our screens. Spoiler alert: it sounds like she’s got her spiky headpiece on standby.

The 49-year-old actress—yes, she’s aging like a fine enchanted wine—first cackled her way into our hearts as the not-so-evil villain in Maleficent (2014) and doubled down on the dark glam in Maleficent: Mistress of Evil (2019). But could there be a third chapter in this fairy tale gone rogue?

In a chat with Deadline, Angelina shared her love for playing characters with “a bit of trauma.” (Read: If your character doesn’t have emotional baggage heavier than a pumpkin carriage at midnight, Angie isn’t interested.) Naturally, Maleficent, queen of the broody stare and dramatic one-liners, checks all the boxes.

“She was struggling in bouts,” Angelina mused, channeling her inner therapist. (We’re assuming “bouts” is Hollywood speak for crying in your castle with a raven on your shoulder.) But despite Maleficent’s misunderstood nature, Angelina says the character toughed it out like a pro. Because who doesn’t cope with existential dread by turning into a dragon occasionally?

When asked if she’d revisit her most fabulous role, Angelina didn’t hesitate: “I would love that. I would love to play her again.” Translation? Somebody start polishing those cheek prosthetics, stat.

Here’s the kicker: Disney already spilled the pixie dust last year, announcing Maleficent 3 was in the works. While the details are more secretive than the recipe for Sleeping Beauty’s curse, the big question remains: Will Maleficent finally find peace, or will she keep serving us drama and highlighter goals?

Until we get an update, we can only hope Angelina’s warming up her wings and practicing her best evil laugh in the mirror. Maleficent doesn’t do small comebacks—she lands with a fireball. 🔥

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