Elon Musk just launched himself into a new galaxy of internet clapbacks—and this time, it’s all about drugs, denial, and…Donald Trump? Yes. Welcome to Earth 2025.
So here’s the cosmic tea: during a galactically strange Q&A, former President Donald “Hair Like Cotton Candy in a Tornado” Trump was asked straight-up if he thinks Elon Musk was ever zooted on White House property. Trump squinted into the void and replied, “I don’t think so… I hope not.” Which is basically the political equivalent of shrugging and eating a Filet-O-Fish.
Elon—who apparently scrolls X harder than a teenager during finals—caught wind of the clip and beamed down a response so intense, it probably broke three satellites.
🚀 He tweeted, “You can tell immediately that someone is a MASSIVE liar if they’re claiming I’m on drugs, as I’m basically the most photographed dude alive. I’m in meetings 7 days a week with everyone from scientists to Martians.”
But wait, there’s more. He added that after one legendary puff of Joe Rogan’s mystery herb, he was subjected to years of surprise drug tests. YEARS. Imagine being Elon Musk and still having to pee in a cup like you’re trying to get your job back at Jamba Juice.
📢 “Not the slightest trace of drugs or alcohol,” Elon said proudly—like a toddler who didn’t eat the crayon this time.
Oh, and yes, Elon has talked openly about using prescription ketamine for his “sad boy episodes,” which honestly just makes him sound like a cyberpunk poet from the year 3020.
So, is Elon Musk on drugs? According to him: absolutely not. According to Trump: maybe? According to Twitter: yes, and they want to know what kind and where to get it.
Stay tuned, Earthlings.
You can tell immediately that someone is a massive liar if they’re claiming I’m on drugs, as I am one of the most photographed people on Earth and am in meetings with a wide array of people 7 days a week!
Moreover, I was randomly drug tested for ~3 years after one semi-puff on…
— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) June 9, 2025
