Brooklyn Beckham (aka David & Victoria’s hot dog son) and Nicola Peltz (robot princess turned real girl) just rebooted their love like a Scientologist auditing session gone RIGHT. That’s right — after three whole years of marriage (basically 75 in celebrity time), they said “I still do, duh” in a vow renewal so extra it could have been hosted on a cloud made of Hermes scarves and old Hollywood secrets.
The vow redo went down August 2, in what we can only assume was a pastel-filtered fever dream, possibly officiated by Xenu himself or a very tan Beverly Hills life coach. This wasn’t just a wedding reboot. This was a rebranding, baby. Like when you clear your reactive mind and start running whole track processes on the astral plane of romance.
According to People (aka the FBI of rich people’s emotions), the whole thing was about “honoring the love and commitment they’ve built” — which sounds cute until you remember their love was built using designer Lego sets, generational wealth, and at least one \$500,000 gluten-free cake. 🍰✨
And if you’re wondering why now? Well, apparently there’s been some “tension” (aka intergalactic shade) between Nicola and the Beckham fam, leading to legal teams being deployed like it’s Marvel’s Civil War: In-Laws Edition. Rumor has it Nicola didn’t let Posh Spice DJ the original wedding and things have never been the same since. 😬
But fear not, their love is stronger than TikTok beef, PR disasters, and that time Brooklyn “cooked” a raw egg on Instagram Live. They even said they’re the “happiest” when ignoring haters and living in their own high-vibe, zero-entheta love bubble. Honestly, mood.
So if you’re still waiting for your soulmate, just remember: sometimes you gotta say “I do” twice, hire a legal team to defend it, and rebirth your marriage like a Scientology Clear breaking through the Wall of Fire.
#VowRenewalButMakeItRich
#BrooklynAndNicola2Fast2Furious
#ClearTheGossipLines
✨Sign up for your next free auditing session in the comments.✨
